Sometimes if it says âextremely graphic videoâ⦠Iâll admit that I have to take a look. So Iâm not complaining that there are gruesome scenes showing the capture and death of Libyan dictator Moammar Gadhafi....  Iâm the one who clicked on it, but I didnât enjoy it.  Times have certainly changed. Scenes that were unattainable a few years ago are now everywhere on internet sites and blogs from around the world. I can imagine that there are plenty of newsrooms conflicted over whether to air some of this stuff. The inevitable technology has brought us a close up view of some exhilarating things⦠and some awful things. Iâm fine with a prime time network show refusing to air lurid video. But I believe that anyone over the age of 5 will see it, if he or she wants to.  Gadhafi was a criminal⦠we get it. And we seem to have more tolerance for a violent demise, as long as heâs âa bad guy.â But the uncontrolled frenzy, the mob mentality of those who surrounded him in his last moments⦠gave me the chills.
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I just want good things to happen to this guy. No, I didnât expect him to return to the 49ers this season. Heâs been vilified, spit on, virtually tarred and feathered⦠and blamed for everything including the Lindbergh kidnapping. To say his first six seasons were a little rocky is the understatement of the year. But look whatâs happened. Sports Illustratedâs Jim Trotter says Alex is âreborn.â With Jim Harbaugh on board⦠and with essentially the same roster as last year⦠the Niners are 5-1. I thought if Alex Smith was just decent this year, it would be a confidence boost for him. Heâs been better than that. And this humble kid (whoâs the same age as Tim Lincecum), still gives credit to his teammates. And his guys love him back. The other day, Frank Gore said âNumber 11âs coming! You ainât seen nothinâ yet.â If Alex keeps this up, heâll be more than the Comeback Player of the Year⦠heâll be Comeback Player of The Decade. No, Alex Smith is not Joe Montana. The good news isâ¦. he doesnât have to be. In this weekâs SI, Peter Kingsuggests that Alex Smith vs. Aaron Rodgers in the NFC title game is not impossible. Yes, this is the same Peter King who picked the Rams to win the West.
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One of my favorite shows is Real Sports on HBO, which seems to pop up once a month. Investigative pieces, player profiles, behind the scenes stories.. theyâre always top notch, and well worth finding. But this monthâs commentary by Bryant Gumbelon the status of the NBA lockout is whatâs drawing a lot of heat. He made reference to NBA Commissioner David Stern as âa modern day plantation overseer.â Yikes. Are you kidding? A slavery reference? You obviously knew that would light a fire. Well, if you just wanted to get Real Sports some attention⦠you certainly got your wish. I donât suppose this discussion will die down anytime soon. Shaun Powell of ESPNNewYork.comwrites, âYou can disagree with his tactics and his strategy and his idea of what makes for a financially stable NBA. But you canât, under any circumstances, compare the most progressive commissioner in sports to a slave owner.â
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I know, youâve heard about the overblown Harbaugh-Schwartz incidenta hundred times this week. But I realized that the Handshake and ensuing melee, which took all of about 12 seconds⦠is a microcosm of what the 49ers have done to most of their opponents this season. They get under your skin, and thereâs nothing you can do about it. Getting beat by a bunch of no-names is so humiliating that afterward you chase them across the field and yell, âYou ruined my day!â They not only refuse to apologize.. theyâre laughing all the way to the locker room.Â
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IndyCar racing star Dan Wheldon is gone, following one of the worst crashes in the history of the sport⦠at Las Vegas Motor Speedway. He was a husband, a father⦠a champion and friend to many. Along with millions, I love the sport of auto racing. Of course, thereâs risk and danger. And some will say that any race track is an accident waiting to happen. But there have beenserious doubtsabout the safety of the steeply banked Las Vegas layout for years.. that itâs too fast, too dangerous. When someone as experienced as Dario Franchitti says, âIndyCars shouldnât be racing hereâ.. someone should listen.Â
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Letâs face it, the 49ers shockedthe Detroit Lions, the team the rest of America has been fawning over for weeks. Most of the NFL reporters wouldnât know Delanie Walker from Delaney and Bonnie⦠and yet that fourth down slant play to the 49ers tight end sealed the deal in a thriller. But all anyone wants to talk about is The Handshake. Hilarious. Hereâs what I saw: Americaâs darling got punched in the mouth by a bunch of no-names. Well, they do have names. Like Anthony Davis, Chilo Rachal, Aldon Smith and Teddy Ginn. And Lions coach Jim Schwartz? I knew you were in trouble when you implied that the 49ers were intimidated by deferring the kickoff. From what I can gather, youâre a cocky loudmouthcoach who even trash talks other players. Oh, you heard an obscenity? Get over it. A hard back slap? Wow. After having your ass kicked for four hours, youâre lucky thatâs all you got.
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I wouldnât wish this on anyone. Well, actually I would. How about this unlikely scenario for this Sunday⦠It would be the ultimate challenge for those giddy Detroit fans, who are obviously basking in all this attention. The Tigers fall to Texas, and miss out on their chance at World Series glory. Within 15 minutes, the upstart San Francisco 49ers stick a dagger in the heart of Americaâs new darlings, and shock the Detroit Lions. Immediately following that, the new owner of the Motor Cityâs NBA franchise announces heâll be relocating the team to the West Coast. After the lockout ends, theyâll be known as the Huntington Beach Pistons. Eat that. Well, at least you still have the Red Wings.
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You canât make this up. A crook in Delaware handed a bank tellera demand note for cash. When the clerk couldnât make out what it said, she slid it back and demanded he re-write it and submit it again. Instead, he bolted out the door⦠and was arrested a few blocks away. I guess he should have invested in a laser printer. Thereâs a scene in Woody Allenâs Take The Money and Run,where Woodyâs character attempts to rob a bank. The teller canât read the demand note and argues over the sentence.. âIâm pointing a gun at you.â The teller says, âThat looks like âgub.â It doesnât look like âgun.ââ
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Wait⦠didnât Terry Francona and GM Theo Epstein help the Boston Red Sox win two World Series after they hadnât sniffed a Championship in a hundred years? Oh well, anyone can have a good decade. Rick Adelman was there for the Kingsâ best years. Letâs run him out. Steve Mariucci? The last guy to take the 49ers to a playoff win. Weâre making some changes.  Bill Neukom? Ten months after The Parade down Market Street⦠who does he think he is? I know, you raise the bar so high⦠expectations change. Everybody gets hypercritical. Fans, sportswriters, the big wigs. Even Christopher Columbus, after opening the door to the New World⦠was shackled and sent to prison. I guess the more things change, the more they stay the same.
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Yeah, the three highest payrolls in baseball are done.. finished for the season. And though Alex Rodriguez took it like a man, to see the highest paid guy in the universe make the final out somehow felt righteous to the Yankee Haters. And the Red Sox collapse? Please. Well, Terry Francona mustâve gotten stupid. You wonât have him to kick around anymore. Oh, and the Phillies? I get the impression theyâre still bitter that the San Francisco Giants embarrassed them last year. The Giants had to have been a fluke, as if they stole their rightful crown. So this year would be different⦠Philadelphia put together the best starting staff in baseball. All that got you is a seat on the sidelines. How do you like the view? Now itâs down to the Tigers, Rangers, Brewers and Cardinals. To be World Champions, just about everything has to go right in October. For only one of them, everything will.
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Well, almost. I got the dreaded âJury Summons,â. This is my week to be available, so I had to check the court websiteevery day to see if I had to report downtown. I kept watching my number slide into the next box, until ultimately.. my service wasnât needed. Yes. Joy. Relief. Thank You. Itâs not that I tried to avoid jury service, but I didnât exactly volunteer. The last time I got called, Iâd barely had time for a cup of coffee⦠and Iâm in the box for a murder trial. Yikes. Iâll tell you, it was a fascinating, learning experience. I saw first-hand how much work goes into prosecuting and defending someone whose life is on the line.  And it doesnât all wrap up in 44 minutes, like on TV. Well, itâs hard not to appreciate the system⦠and the judges, prosecutors, defenders and police who toil in it. It's not lost on me.  Maybe I'll catch you next time.
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Well, it turns out I didnât know squat. Once again, I gladly enrolled at the University of Ken Burns. After watching his stunning 5 ½ hour Prohibition documentary about a remarkable chapter of Americaâs history, I realized Iâve been uninformed at best. At worst, I must be a complete dunce. The story of alcoholism, morality and values spans more than a hundred years, so the ratification of the Eighteenth Amendment didnât happen overnight. Prohibition was supposed to be the answer to so many of our problems. It wasnât. Law-abiding citizens became criminalsâ¦. and thugs not only got rich, they became celebrities. Catch this excellent film if you can. Youâll see why Prohibitionis a lot more than machine guns and Al Capone. And why weâre still asking relevant questions about the role of government in peopleâs lives, and who is â and who is not â a real American.
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Lots of people like to go rock climbing. The great outdoors, fresh air.. the exhilaration. But after seeing Alex Honnold scale the face of a mountain, calling it climbing seems ridiculous. Lara Logan featured Alex on 60 Minutesâ¦. and it was fascinating, jaw-dropping and more than a little scary. Alex, whoâs 26, is from Sacramento⦠and heâs the Leonardo da Vinci of climbers. What he does is called free-soloing. He climbs mountain faces and rocks without ropes⦠no climbing gear, no hooks, harnesses⦠no nothing. Of course, one little slip⦠one loose rock and youâre gone. I know, itâs insane. Heâs the first person to free-solo climb up the northwest face of Half Dome, 2,000 feet straight up in Yosemite. Heâs climbed rock walls people wouldnât tackle WITH ropes. Alex, Iâd rather you not do this anymore. Iâd like you to see age 30⦠but I donât suppose youâll take my advice. Lara Logan.. thanks for the story. Â
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Oh the 49ers didnât do much. They only came from 20 down midway through the third quarter to upset the Philadelphia Eagles on the road⦠and are now an unlikely 3-1. Yeah the Eagles, known as The Dream Team, amassed a staggering 500 yards on offense⦠and Michael Vick is as dangerous as advertised. So how in the world did this happen? Thatâs what Philly coach Andy Reid is wondering. His tight-lipped post game comments were priceless⦠he was STEAMING. Did the Eagles aid in their embarrassment? Of course⦠two field goals missed and a couple of big fumbles. But the 49ers took advantage⦠and with every first down, every completed pass, every dive into the end zoneâ¦. their confidence grows. And it looks like DeSean Jackson likes to trash talk before the game's over. You know what that makes you? 1-3. Hilarious.
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I was wrong about Moneyball. I thought it unlikely that anyone whoâs not a baseball fan would be very interested in stats, on-base percentage and the Oakland As. But sure enough, itâs scoring big box office numbers⦠and as baseball movies go, itâs got plenty of mainstream appeal.   But Moneyball is not just about baseball is it? Itâs for anybody whoâs ever dreamed of taking on the big guys, of challenging the way things are⦠ and itâs about believing in yourself. I loved this movie. Finding undervalued players is at the core of the story. And I was wondering if thereâs a sabermetrics for offensive linemen? I mean the 49ers could use some help thereâ¦
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And I thought the Giants Faithful were a little down. Theyâre downright giddy compared to what Boston Red Sox fans must be feeling today. What happened last night, the culmination of a horrendous free fall⦠was cruelty personified. They went into September with a nine game lead.. and squandered it away. No matter how you try and explain it⦠injuries, weariness, bad karma, the moon not in alignment⦠you canât go 7-20 down the stretch and expect a parade. And the Atlanta Braves, who had a ten game lead over the Cardinals in late August⦠couldnât gather any momentum, and losttheir final five games. Goodnight. The offseason can be a long, cold stretch. Itâs especially lonely when you canât help but feel.. that you choked.
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Like so many professionals from the old days, shoeshine guys seem to be a dying breed. You just donât see many around anymore, understandable in these times. Thatâs why I loved Bob Shallitâs piece on âChickâ Richardson, who may be one of the longest tenured shoeshine guys in Sacramento. Of course, you can do your own shoes, but when an expert whoâs lovingly mastered the art form does them for you⦠itâs way cool. In this past year, Iâve discovered old school craftsmen who repair watches,repair shoesâ¦. and now I can add a shoeshine pro to the list. Not that I need them all tomorrowâ¦. I just feel good about knowing where they are.Â
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A T & T Park has been a packed house all season long for the World Champion Giants⦠and the energy and love from millions of fans is not lost on the players and management. As the season winds down, Iâve watched Bruce Bochy, Ryan Vogelsong, Tim Lincecum, Cody Ross and so many others express their thanks to a loyal fan base that has allowed them to play their hearts out⦠to reach for their dreams. Fans matter. It reminded me that The Eagle has loyal fans too.. who know us, reach out to us, question us⦠and appreciate the best in Classic Rock. You make our shows successful, and help support dozens of worthy causes. Believe me, without you⦠weâre not here. Thank you for allowing us to do what we love.
My reaction wasâ¦âWait a minute⦠what just happened there?â Late in the Bears-Packers game, the Chicago Bears nearly  pulled off one of the great misdirection plays in the history of televised football. The Pack, with a comfortable lead, punted to Chicago. Then, things got more than a little weird. Devin Hester, the most dangerous return man in football, pretended to drift under the ball⦠and so did his teammates. The Packers headed straight for him. But the ball actually came down on the other side of the field, where it was caught by Johnny Knox, who streaked down the right sideline for a touchdown⦠or so we thought. A holding call negated what will be remembered as one of the coolest trick plays in the NFL archives. Actually, Joe Buck didnât get too excitedabout it⦠I kind of wish Al Michaels had the call.
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Of course itâs a dagger in the heart of the ever loyal Giants fans, whoâve grinded out every at-bat, every heartbreaking loss. But come on, itâs been damned entertaining. With the absolutely woeful, impotent offense⦠these guys should have finished in the cellar. Only the pitching has kept them in contention for this long. I mean, it seems like theyâve lost 100 games 2-1 or 1-0â¦. It happened over and over again. I know, if Tim Lincecum had been with the Yankees, heâd be 21-6. Same with Matt Cain. We get it. But itâs a tough game, and thereâs a fine line between an empty stadium and a packed house. You played your asses off, and it didnât work out. So hold your heads high. All in all, itâs been quite a ride. Canât wait for spring training.
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Martin Kessman and I have something in common⦠we love burgers. But heâs a little larger than I am, and the 290 pound New York man is upset at White Castle â¦.because he finds it hard to fit into their booths.   He was so incensed that heâs filed a lawsuit in Manhattan federal court. Oh, the humiliation. Oh, the annoyance. We get it. But do we have to sue everyone⦠over every little annoyance? Mr. Kessman says, âI just want to sit down like a normal person.â Hereâs an idea⦠if you want to sit down like a normal person,  spend a little more time becoming one. How âbout a walk around the block once in a while?
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In a story that has rocked the poker community,the US Justice Department has accused principals of Full Tilt Poker... of defrauding thousands of online poker players out of more than $300 million that is still owed to them. This isnât some nickel and dime website⦠itâs been one of the best known, heavily promoted sites out there.   A US attorney said âFull Tilt was not a legitimate poker company, but a global Ponzi scheme.â And those named in the civil suit include Howard Lederer and Chris âJesusâ Ferguson.  Yikes. Those who follow the game will tell you that these two donât exactly fit the profile of âsleazy crooks.â Theyâre two of the best known players in the world, whose reputations were impeccable. Until now. In any case, this doesnât look good⦠and Iâm anxious to see how this all shakes out. All I know is⦠you just canât put a guy named âJesusâ behind bars.
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I agree with Monty Poole of the San Jose Mercury News.. whoâs recent story suggests that success can be hazardous to your career. Yeah, prosperity can be costly. The Golden State Warriors had gone years without sniffing the playoffs.  Then, not long after upsetting top seed Dallas one year, GM Chris Mullin was gone. The last time the 49ers won the NFC West, they actually made it to the second round of the playoffs. Not good enough⦠Steve Mariucci was fired. Rick Adelman had a marvelous run with the Sacramento Kings, and he was then run out of town. The Giants took it to Game Seven of the 2002 World Series. What happened to the manager, Dusty Baker? Oh, gone. And now, not even a year removed from the uncontrolled euphoria down Market Street, the World Series Championsâ top guy, Bill Neukom, has been escorted out of the building. So there it is. Give it all youâve got⦠play your heart out⦠then watch your back.
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As the Giantsâ season comes to an end, those of us whoâve lived and died with every pitch know the highs and lows of trying to do the near impossible⦠repeat as World Series Champions. But they sure have been fun to watch. There are new kids coming into their own.. Brett Pill, Brandon Belt, Brandon Crawford and Madison Bumgarner. And Ryan Vogelsong has been the feel-good story of the year. But I donât think Iâve seen anyone play the game with more joy, more enthusiasm than the Panda. Pablo Sandoval. He looks like he embraces every moment of every inning with a free-spirited, unapologetic love of the game, and it infuses those around him with the same spirit. The other night, I saw his reaction when a teammate hit a home run. With legs that must be bone-weary, the Panda jumped so high, his head hit the top of the dugout. Watching Panda.. has been a joy. Now, Brandon Belt? Heâs kinda dour.
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Of course the 49ers and the Dallas Cowboys have a long history⦠and plenty of pundits canât stop bringing that up. Oh, the âRivalryâ⦠Oh, itâs âThe Catchâ⦠Oh, itâs Bill Walsh and Tom Landryâ¦I know every blogger, tweeter and self-described expert has to fill up time and space. What does it all mean for Sunday? It doesnât mean squat. This is about 2011, and Iâll go out on the limb and say Jim Harbaugh is living in the moment. He doesnât care what Michael Irvin or Troy Aikman thinks. Heâs game planning for Tony Romo, Dez Bryant and holy smokes⦠what are we gonna do about DeMarcus Ware?   Yes, this is an important game for Mr. Harbaugh and the Niners, who started last year 0-5. So all the blowhard talk can be distilled into one sentence: âIf the underdog 49ers can find a way to eke out an unlikely win over the Cowboys, theyâll be 2-0 with momentum on their side.â  Whatâs your deal?
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With so many beat writers following the San Francisco Giants, thereâs naturally a lot of overlapping coverage. Thatâs fine with us fans, who want to hear, see and read every morsel of every little detail about the Orange and Black. But when it all hit the fan yesterday, only one guy, Mark Purdy of the San Jose Mercury News, broke the stunning story. Markâs homework obviously paid off, and he had the scoop of the yearâ¦.that Giantsâ managing general partner and chief executive officer Bill Neukom was out as head honcho, after a fallout with the Executive Committee of the Giantsâ ownership group. Derek Moore and I were talking about the fact that anyone can be a blogger⦠anyone can tweet whatever they want. But this is old school journalism⦠a lot of digging, prodding, protecting sources and sifting through whatâs fact and what isnât. Nice work, Mark. By the way, the company line is that this is a âretirement.â Hilarious.Â
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I think the creativity and vision of those at the helm of NFL Filmshave been, in no small measure, responsible for the skyrocketing popularity of NFL Football in America. The emotion of Vince Lombardi on the sideline, the booming voice of John Facenda announcing the arrival of the Oakland Raiders, that spiral from Montana to Clark⦠these moments lovingly captured on film have made a great game even greater. So when I found out that the producers at NFL Films are behind a new series,A Football Life⦠well, I wanted you to know about it. Their first subject is Patriots coach Bill Belichick, the only coach ever wired for sound for an entire NFL season. By the way, of all the coaches who could have agreed to this kind of access, the last one I would expect would be Mr. Belichick. Isnât he the guy under the hoodie who never answers questions? I mean he makes Jim Harbaugh look like a chatterbox. So here it comes⦠ Part I of Bill Belichick: A Football Life premieres exclusively on the NFL Network tomorrow.
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The thing that drives the media horde crazy about 49ers Head Coach Jim Harbaugh is what I love the most. He just doesnât answer their questionswith much⦠well, with much substance. Heâs vague, elusive, snarky and not very forthcoming. And the dumber the questions get, the less he says. Hilarious.  I guess people expect him to explain his thought process about the offense, defense, special teams⦠play calling and what heâll have for dinner. His attitude seems to be âIâll just keep that to myself, thank you.â Jim Harbaugh reminds me of the best poker players Iâve seen⦠like Tom Dwan, Patrik Antonius and Phil Ivey. They say nothing, show nothing,  reveal even less.⦠then stack you off. Will this be a fun season? Iâll just keep that to myselfâ¦
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Alex Smith.. a resurrection? Too early to tell. But this was huge for him⦠seven years of underachieving, and now he wins? Sure he was only 15 for 20, but what was more significant was what DIDNâT happen: He didnât fumble, throw an interception, get sackedâ¦. or run out of time getting a play call in.  Itâs only one game, but The Jim Harbaugh Era has begun.. and this means way more than just beating the Seahawks. Things have changed, and hereâs how I knowâ¦Â It was The Hug. When Alex came to the bench following his touchdown plunge, the coach hugged his quarterback as if heâd just won Dancing With The Stars. I thought he was gonna French Kiss him. That moment told me this team has moved on⦠from the darkness of Singletary-Nolan-Erickson to something resembling hope. Yeah, Dallas is coming in and we could lose to the Cowboys 45-3⦠so what? For the moment, the 49ers are tied for first place. And after what weâve seen the last few years, isn't that worth a hug?
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I suddenly felt like jumping into a Fantasy Football League⦠then I caught myself. What am I thinking? I donât do Fantasy Football. Oh, I know itâs taken the country by stormâ¦Â there are even a dozen sports shows devoting precious airtime to fake roster spots. I get it. And all of my friends are ready to roll. Brian, Derek, Chris and Lizann are obsessedâ¦.up to their necks in draft picks, trades and speculation. Theyâre wondering when Iâll join the rest of civilization and finally take the plunge. Being an âimaginaryâ General Manager/Head Coach? I donât think so⦠I have enough trouble with real life. And as the All-Pro is carted off the field with a career-threatening injury, you know what the guy on the couch is saying?   âThat better not be my tight end!â
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As the pennant chase takes a dark turn for the Giants, thereâs a bright light on the horizon⦠or at least we hope there is. And hope is a precious commodity now. Giants minor league prospect Brett Pill, who will turn 27 tomorrow, finally made his Major League debut on Tuesday and hit the first pitch he swung at off the second deck of the Western Metal Supply Company. Before Duane Kuiper got to âHigh Drive..â it was gone. Then yesterday, ho humâ¦. he cranked out another home run. And heâs been in the bigs two days. A lot of fans are wondering why he wasnât brought up soonerâ¦. heâs actually older than Matt Cain, Panda, Brandon Belt and of course Madison Bumgarner. Guess he was biding his time. It remains to be seen if a nickname will stick⦠âPill The Thrill,â âThe Pill-ager,â âBrett The Threat,ââ¦..Well, if you keep hittinâ, who cares?
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Though I havenât been in a literature class since the Truman administration (or so it seems), I still remember the titles of those wonderful classics. Well, I didnât actually read them⦠I was too busy screwing around. I donât even think I used the CliffsNotes versions⦠that would have been too much trouble. Now I see this little find. Book-A-Minute Classicsoffers⦠guess what? Condensed versions of classic books. Iâm talking about the gist of the story in about three sentences. How about Jane Eyre? Edward Rochester..âMy secret is that I have a lunatic wife.â Jane Eyre..âBye.â (Jane Eyre leaves. Somebody dies. Jane Eyre returns.) THE END. Where was this when I needed it?
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Sunday was a Ryan Vogelsong gem.. maybe his finest performance of the year. In front of a packed house (as every home game is), the series clincher with the D-backs was a microcosm of the season of 2011. A Giants pitcher puts it on the line and gets absolutely no support when he needs it most. When youâre last in just about every offensive category, what do you expect? Pathetic, heartbreaking⦠and hard to watch. So what now? Well, suck it up⦠give the youngsters some experience, play your ass off and hold your head high. Itâs been a hell of a run.
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for predicting the 49ers will finish in the cellar of the Tough-As-Nails NFC West. This all takes me back to last year. The Niners had actually won all of their exhibition games.. and players, media and fans were pretty jacked up. I recall several âexpertsâ picking the 49ers to do well⦠maybe even winning the division. We all know how that turned out. The predictable offense, botched time outs, porous secondaryâ¦. âIâve got to look at the film..â Make no mistake, grizzled Niner fans arenât expecting miracles. This will be a long road to respectability. But maybe the Jim Harbaugh-led roster has found some hope, some new life after last nightâs inspired play. And he wonât have to âlook at the film.â
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Though people have been grumbling about Aaron Rowand and Miguel Tejada for weeks (or months), it was still a bombshell when they were shown the door yesterday. Check out Andrew Baggarlyâs excellent piece hereâ¦. And Mark Purdyâs here. The moment the story hit, the change in body language was palpable⦠the bounce in the step was back. And Iâm talking about the fans. The players? Well, they went out and won a game.. and actually looked like they were having fun. To say Rowand has not performed is the understatement of the year, and you get the impression he wasnât exactly a breath of fresh air in the clubhouse. As for Tejada, Bruce Jenkins said âHe hung himself the other day when he said, glumly, âI just work hereââ¦. explaining why he didnât run hard to first base when asked to bunt⦠but thatâs the attitude of a quitter.â Some managers would have cut him right there. Matter of fact, the moment after Miggie completes his slow trot to first base,  I envision a golf cart arriving with all his bags packed. It picks him upâ¦.whisks him down the line and through a gate in the right field fence. Goodbye and Good Luck.
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Niner fans are understandably anxious about tomorrow. We donât know what weâre going to get. What started out as unbridled optimism turned south pretty quickly, especially after last weekâs embarrassing debacle against Houston. Of course, itâs only preseason but a bad night is a bad night. Even Head Coach Jim Harbaugh seemed at a loss for words. I enjoyed the Barry Tompkins pieceon what Jim really means. JH Answer: âWeâre in training camp mode.â What JH really means: âRight now, we suck.â Matter of fact, this is kind of a pattern these days⦠and I donât blame him. When he says âI have a lot of respect for Taylor Maysâ.. I think he means âIâm glad heâs not in our secondary.â âTheir offense will be a challenge..â is code for⦠âI hope they donât drop 60 on us.â How about Colin Kaepernick? âI just want to get better every day.â Which means  âIâm so confused I canât even think straight.â And when the coach says âI donât want to single anyone out.â I think he means âWhat was Joe Staley doing while they were running by him⦠taking pictures?âÂ
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Donât blame Tim Lincecum for those gopher balls he served up. Hereâs my take on the situation⦠The Giants have had a first class pitching staff, and a last place offense. Sooner or later, the bottom drags down the top. You just canât ask a pitcher to throw a shutout every single game. Giving up one run is fine⦠but when it gets to two,the roof caves in. Heâs thinking âOh no⦠weâre sunk now..â You can see it in the body language. Itâs happened to Timmy, to Cain, to Vogelsong and to Mad Bum. The shocking thing is they havenât snapped⦠thrown tantrums, taken hostages. And Shawn Estes says âWell, you canât think that way.â Guess what Sherlock, theyâre all thinking that way, âcuz theyâre human. Iâd bet the Huntington Beach Little Leaguers could take two out of three from the Giants. I wish I was kiddingâ¦
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Ask any Giants fanâ¦. These are desperate times. After last nightâs embarrassing loss to the lowly Houston Astros (again), you get the feeling Bruce Bochyâs gonna blow his top. And with that size 8 ¼ noggin, that could do a lot more damage than that little 5.8 quake the other day. Yeah, former minor league journeyman Henry Sosa was pitching on three days rest, and the Giants hitters turned Henry into Bob Gibson. It was like watching the Hindenburg in slow motion⦠you know whatâs about to happen, and you canât stop it. So what do you do, bench some guys? Itâs slim pickings there.  Theyâve got more guys that are bedridden than a hospital ship. How âbout the young dudes? If youâre gonna fail, Iâd rather lose with Brandon Crawford, Brett Pill, Gary Brown, Darren Ford and Eric Surkamp. How could they be worse than your current killer lineup? Oh by the way⦠ before last night, Houston had lost 25 of 30 games on the road. Did I say it was hard to watch?
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I thought this was a joke but I was wrong.   The UK Daily Mail is reporting that Susanne Eman, an Arizona mother of two boys, tips the scales at more than 700 pounds. She doesnât want to lose weight⦠she wants to put it on, and become the fattest human in history. Thatâs right, her âgoalâ is 1600 pounds. Sheâs currently consuming around 22,000 calories a day, and her breakfast menualone could feed 60 people. âThe bigger I get, the better I feel,â says Susanne. âI feel more confident and sexy. Why shouldnât I push the limits and see how fat I can get and stay healthy?â Woman, you are not overweight.. or fat.. or obese.  You are bat$##t crazy!
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Yes, we understand that for those on the East Coast, feeling the building shake can be plenty frightening. But seriously, a 5.8earthquakedoesnât bother us too much in California. We sneeze bigger than that. And I know you were more than a little offended when the tweeters called you âwhiners.â But come on, if we freaked out over a huge snowstorm, youâd be the first ones laughing at us. The rugged Easterners get 5 feet of snow⦠then drive to work. I get it. Here in Sacramento, if a snowflake hits my windshield,  Iâm calling 9-1-1.Â
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Going to an NFL game is supposed to be exhilarating. The tailgate party, the steamy scrumptious hot dogs⦠cheering your team on in the crisp cold air. What the heck has happened? There have been loud, boisterous fans at football games for a hundred years⦠but things have changed. Does a family actually feel safe when some burly dudes in the next row are screaming obscenities at each other the entire game? I used to laugh when I saw scenes of soccer violence in Europe⦠with some fans actually sequestered behind cages. Itâs not so funny now. I donât know what the answer is⦠but the best view of the game might be from my couch.
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If it wasnât so painful, itâd be laughable. Whereâs Carlos Beltran? Brian Wilson? How about Andres Torres, Sergio Romo? Is Miguel Tejada a double play waiting to happen or am I just being a cruel pessimist? This is crunch time, and the Giants are playing their worst baseball of the year. When the Pirates had a Ten Game Losing Streakâ¦Â the Giants were just what the doctor ordered. Florida had lost 7 in a rowâ¦Â hey, bring on the Giants. You get the picture. And Houston, whoâve already lost nearly 100 games⦠slapped the Giants around all week. Had Panda not gone deepyesterday, Iâm telling you, Bruce Bochy was on the verge of taking hostages and barricading a convenience store. And stop saying the Giants are set to play some losing teams. I promise you, theyâre all lickinâ their chops to get at the World Champs.  I know weâve got more than a month to go. But with apologies to Yogi Berraâ¦. Itâs gettingâ late early.
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I heard that Ashton Kutcher has sold the idea of a DMV reality showto truTV. I donât think heâs kidding⦠it's about the California Department of Motor Vehicles. When I was a kid, I tuned into The Rifleman, Andy Griffith, Gunsmoke and The Fugitive. Now, weâll have DMV. With shows about parking, storage lockers and hoarders⦠Iâm sure youâre not surprised. The VP of truTV said..âThis promises to be a fast-paced, fun seriesâ¦â I wish you well, but Iâm dying to see what about DMVâ¦is âfast-paced.âÂ
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In the midst of this feeble stretch of excruciating Giants losses, they actually tieda home run record. Well, itâs not one youâd want to brag about. When Pablo Sandoval cranked one out yesterday, it was the 19th consecutive SOLO home run the club has hit. Way to get on base. No Major League team has had that many solo shots in a row⦠ since the Philadelphia Phillies of 1914. Their star pitcher that year was Grover Cleveland Alexander. As a matter of fact, if the Hall of Famer were still around, he could have entered the game for Jonathan Sanchez. Although heâd be 124 years old, I still think Mr. Alexander would have had better command of the strike zone.  Â
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Iâm not sure if this would be the ultimate honor or the ultimate humiliation. Giants ace Tim Lincecum is challenging fans to a video competition in which they are asked to duplicate his unorthodox delivery on video⦠for an opportunity to hit against him at spring training next year. Oh yeah, stepping in against the two-time Cy Young Award winner with the 94 mph fastball? That should be tons of fun. Entries are open through September 16. Go to facebook.com/timlincecum. Actually, Iâm hoping for a contest in which you can try and strike out Aaron Rowand. You might get more entries for that.
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Just a pinch between your cheek and gums⦠Yes, this little endeavor of sucking on smokeless tobacco is all too pervasive in the field and in the dugouts of Major League Baseball.  And I think we all know that itâs a nasty, poisonous habitâ¦. and that nothing good will come of it. Janie McCaule of AP has a great storyabout Giants skipper Bruce Bochy, whoâd been âdippingâ for nearly 40 yearsâ¦. and has quit with the help of hypnotherapist Dr. AlVera Paxon. She also helped bullpen catcher Billy Hayes and long time equipment manager Mike Murphy kick the dip. Amazing⦠congratulations. Derek Moore tells me that Dr. Paxonâs next project is Barry Zito⦠in an effort to help him give up baseballâ¦
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As far as I could tell, he didnât hit a single drive, nail an approach shot or sink any putts. But the unquestioned media darling coming off the green at Bridgestone wasStevie Williams. I know youâre the worldâs greatest caddie⦠I get it. Yes, you wanted everyone to know how badly Tiger treated you.. Okay. But when the media horde surrounded you, I was hoping that youâd try and squeeze in the fact that this was Adam Scottâsday⦠that he played really well and beat a terrific field. That didnât happen. It was all about ME. MY vindication, MY tournament win. I was actually embarrassed. The irony is⦠had you shown a little humility, I think your status as âcaddie-heroâ would have been even more enhanced. So much for the Three Caddie Rules:   Wake up; Keep up; and Shut Up.
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This whole phone hackingscandal is despicable, donât you think? Employees of Rupert Murdochâs News Corporation have been accused of engaging in phone hacking, police bribery and other bad deedsâ¦. in the pursuit of publishing stories. Victims have included plenty of celebrities, politicians, relatives of deceased soldiersâ¦. and even members of the British Royal Family. And hereâs a surprise. One of the loudest victims has been the irrepressible Heather Mills,who just canât seem to get over herself. Not that she ever wants publicity butâ¦Heatherâs gotta be thinkingâ¦â Itâs time to sue Paul again.â
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So baseball pundits are all atwitter about Alex Rodriquez. He may have taken part in some pricey poker games with the likes of Tobey Maguireâ¦. and this could lead to a suspension.  I know Alex is an easy target. Heâs rich, heâs got all the babes⦠and heâs a punk. From what Iâve heard, he wasnât dealing drugs, torturing animals, or molesting underage girls. He played some poker. And if youâre sitting with a cash player like Tobey Maguire, youâre running with a high stakes crowd. Do you know what they call guys like Alex Rodriquez? A fish. And the big fish with lots of cash are calledâWhales.â It reminds me of the Alec Baldwin scene.. âTheyâre waiting to give you their money. Are you gonna take it? Are you man enough to take it?â
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With all of this talk about the âdebt crisisâ⦠may I offer up The Jackass Factor? Forget about the wealthy, the poor, the middle class. I think people who are exceptionally arrogant, rude or annoying should pay more taxes. A lot more. And let me be even more frank. You should dish out more for parking, hotel rooms, pizza, concert tickets, airfare and everything else. Letâs say a Woodford Reserve Bourbon is $8.50. The Jackass price is 35 dollars. So you take your family to the buffet⦠12.99 a person. If youâre a real Jackass.. thatâll be 175 bucks. Believe me, decent people would love it. And weâd turn this deficit into a surplus in about 6 weeks. Whoâs with me?
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Wealthy beyond most peopleâs dreams, heâs been humiliated, vilified and blamed for every major disaster including the Lindbergh kidnapping. Okay, it hasnât been easy. Barry Zitoâs never whined, cursed the media or played the diva. But itâs becoming increasingly clear that highest paid guy on your team canât get anybody out. This just in⦠  thatâs hard to do with a belt high change-up or an 82 mph fastball. Heâs not a criminal. Heâs just not getting it done on the mound. No matter how much money you have, thatâs tough to swallow. If Iâm Bruce Bochy, Iâd invent an injury and put you on the DL until September comes. Oh wait⦠I guess that already happened.
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Sorry to hear of the death of G.D. Spradlin, who passed away last week at his San Luis Obispo ranch at age 90. Dennis McLellan of the LA Timeswrites that Mr. Spradlin was a successful lawyer and oilman who didnât get into acting until he was in his 40s. And boy, he had some juicy parts in his 30 year acting career. None more riveting than his breakthrough role as Senator Pat Gearyin Godfather II.  âI donât like your kind of people. I donât like to see you come out to this clean country in your oily hair â dressed up in those silk suits â and try to pass yourselves off as decent Americans. Iâll do business with you, but the fact is, I despise your masquerade â the dishonest way you pose yourself. Yourself, and your whole f***ing family.â Oh, Iâll never forget that scene. Rest in peace, sir, and thank you.
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You could just feel itâ¦Â This was the payback series for the Phillies fans. How could the Left Coast Misfits steal the thunder from the vaunted Phils last year? The Giants got lucky, they got all the breaks, they got hot at just the right timeâ¦theyâre a fluke, and on and on and on.  But not this time, not in the Phillies ballpark. The Phils pitching is the best in the bigs⦠their bats will maul you, and they havenât lost two games in a row at home since April 19. Theyâre the big dogs⦠and they know it. But things got real quiet yesterday, as sick little Tim Lincecum and the Giants bullpen shut down Ryan Howard, Chase Utley and Shane Victorino on the way to taking two of three. Talk about putting a damper on the festivitiesâ¦Â kind of like that shower in the late innings.  Obviously I still think the Philadelphia Phillies are the team to beat, but on this day⦠the silence was deafening. Oh, did I mention⦠the Phillies hadnât lost two in a row at home since April 19th?
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The speculation was mind boggling. Oh, itâll never be Beltran⦠Itâll be Cuddyer⦠no BJ Upton⦠no Hunter Penceâ¦And when the tweets were coming in yesterday, they literally were changing by the moment. The Giants are giving up Gary Brown⦠no, itâs Brown, Jonathan Sanchez and Zack Wheeler. No, theyâre giving up 4 blocks of Chinatown and Lombard Street⦠But itâs over. Six time All Star Carlos Beltranwill be in the lineup today as a San Francisco Giant. I canât wait until he returns to AT & T Park. Jeff Keppinger got a standing ovation when he came out of the dugout for the first time. Keppinger! When Beltran strides to the plate⦠there could be a police escort, fly-over⦠and a parade. Does this guarantee that the offense will improve? No. But I like our chances.
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I know, it's been hard to watch the sinking ship known as the 49ers these past few seasons. Nolanâs awful⦠Singletaryâs a disaster⦠how can you bring Alex Smith back! Youâve heard it all. And now, Takeo Spikes is shown the door⦠and say goodbye to center David Baas. The dominos are beginning to fall as summer camp finally gets rolling, and more are falling by the minute. Is there a lot of room for improvement? Of course.. and this is a monstrous work in progress. But in my view, the wild card is Jim Harbaugh. The new coach is just nutty enough⦠passionate, wound-up and committed to a fault to make a difference in these underachievers. The 49ers won all of 6 games last year. But 7 games won the division.  SEVEN! So whoâs playbook do you want out there, Harbaughâs⦠or Singletaryâs? I rest my case.
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While this visit was under the radar for the rest of the country, I think the Giants Faithful were thrilled that the President of the United States made time to honor the World Champion San Francisco Giants. Sure, this has been a yearly tradition since President Reaganâs time in the White House, but these were The Misfits⦠and it was great to see the SFGiants videoof the ceremony. Within an hour, the President would prepare to address the nation. With critical economic troubles looming, itâs hard to imagine one human being having this much on his plate. Bill Neukom has got to be thinkingâ¦.âWow, I can sure relate to the debt crisis⦠I mean weâve got Barry Zitoâ¦.â
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Iâve known Bob Fletcher for 30 years. And this modest, soft spoken man, a true American war hero, turns 100 tomorrow. As Steve Magagnini points out in his wonderful Sacramento Bee piece, Bob saw 2500 of his Japanese American neighbors in my home town of Florin suddenly shipped off to internment camps during the dark days of World War II. Most of the families lost their farms, their belongings, their homes. But Bob chose the unpopular path. Despite being called a âJap Lover,â Bob quit his job to save three farms (which comprised nearly 100 acres) of his Japanese American neighbors while they were behind barbed wire. Bob worked the land, paid off the mortgages, split the profits and gave the balance to the owners (the Tsukamotos, the Nittas and the Okamotos) when they returned to Florin. I hope the Bob Fletcher story is one that will never be forgotten. So Happy Birthday to one of the most inspirational people Iâve ever known.
Survivors in Action and the 911 Cell Phone Bankhave partnered to collect old cell phones⦠so that they can be recycled and distributed to needy crime victims, the elderly and children in our area who need a cell phone for emergency. Survivors in Action founder, Alexis Moore, is a survivor of domestic violence and stalking and knows how valuable an emergency phone can be for victims. âA cell phone is a personâs life-line to first responders⦠there is nothing worse than to need a cell phone and not have one. Thatâs why I am very excited about our partnership with the 911 Cell Phone Bank.â The 911 Cell Phone Bank is an initiative of The Charitable Recycling Foundation, Inc., an organization dedicated to converting idle assets, like cell phones, for use toward the public good. To find out how and where to drop off your unused phone, visitSurvivors in Action. Â
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Okay, so Clayton Kershaw is untouchable. What else is new? The Giants lost a heartbreaker (again) yesterday to the mean old Dodgers, so naturally the Faithful were a little down. But, except for one mistake⦠Tim Lincecum threw a gem, the home crowd gave a rousing welcome to new arrival Jeff Keppinger,  and Sergio Romo had the shut down performance of the year.  And a lot of fans are still buzzing about The Star Spangled Banner, played by local favorite Jackie Greene. Iâll tell you, it was terrific. I havenât seen any video of yesterdayâs performance, but I did find his National Anthem from last summer. Enjoy it here.
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What idiot stays up until 3am trying to find out who ultimately makes Pokerâs November Nine? Oh, that would be me. Couldnât it wait until the next day? I guess so, but in poker, you have to live in the moment.  The World Series of Pokerâs Main Event is now setâ¦. After 8 grueling days of play, a field that began with 6,865 players has been pared down to just nine. Gary Wiseof ESPN.com has an excellent piece on those remaining (representing seven countries) who have a shot at poker immortalityâ¦. and the top prize of $8.7 Million. Thatâs a lot of glue. You could win The Masters, The Kentucky Derby and the Daytona 500 in the same year⦠and not have 8.7 million. And pokerâs ultimate showdown wonât happen until November, so I can finally get some sleep.
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You may have seen this WSBTV storyout of Midway, Georgia. The cops have put the squeeze on a lemonade stand run by three girls, who were trying to raise money to go to a water park. Apparently the girls needed business and food permits ($50 a day), even if the stand is at a residence. In other words, selling lemonade in your yard is illegal. Yes, I realize cities are strapped for cash⦠who isnât? But come on⦠Way to put a damper on the entrepreneurial spirit. Iâll bet they wouldnât have done this to The Little Rascalsâ¦
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No, a young gun didnât win, Phil Mickelson came up a little short, and Rory is not Tiger. In the end, the story belonged to Darren Clarke, the 42 year old pro whoâd gone through so much personal tragedy, having lost his wife to cancer. He must have wondered if all of his best celebrations were behind him. No, heâs the 2011 Open Champion, and as he hoisted the famous Claret Jug, all seemed right with the world.  Nice work, sir.
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Thereâs a story out of Monroeville, Pennsylvania thatâs causing a bit of a stir. It seems McDainâs Restaurant is not going to be confused with the other McDâs anytime soon. Starting tomorrow, kids under 6 will no longer be admitted. The owner says âtheir volume canât be controlled and many, many times, they have disturbed customers.â Okay, little ones can be a little noisy⦠such is life. But Iâm not sure if I like banning people under a certain age or over a certain age. What Iâd love to see isâ¦. banning people who are annoying. You know⦠if youâre obnoxious, rude, condescending.. youâre out. One day, there may be a simple scanner at the entrance.. a jackass detector. Most people just walk through it, no problem. Come on in. But you? Oh, oh⦠you have jackass tendencies. Thatâs not a crime⦠you just canât eat here. I think the rest of us would appreciate it.Â
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There was a story in the UK Mirrorthat got my attention. A fellow was arrested for an armed robbery in Britain. What led police to him wasâ¦. the crook had written about the crime in his daily planner. On the day of the heist, heâd jotted âGo Portsmouth, robbery happens.â A detective said, âWhen we found the diary we thought it was unusual. You donât normally get such a good piece of evidence like that. Be he was foolish enough to put it in and he said in his interview that it was stupid.â No kidding? Oh, and about your plannerâ¦.maybe âplanningâ is not your strong suit. And we wonder why our prisons are overflowingâ¦
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The Faithful got through the All Star Break⦠and youâve got to admit, weâre feeling pretty good. Ryan Vogelsong was introduced as an All Star (unthinkable in the spring), Panda ripped a solid double to drive in a run, Tim Lincecum and Matt Cain got to restâ¦. and The Beard slammed the door. Props to Bruce Bochy for runninâ the show his way. Oh, and the Giants, even with their impotent offenseâ¦.. still lead the NL West. And if you need a little more excitement,donât forget tonightâs premiere episode of the Giants docudramaâThe Franchiseââ¦on SHOWTIME. Get an inside look at some of the young seasonâs highsâ¦. and lows, including one of the most talked about incidents of the year, the devastating injury to Buster Posey.
Saw a great story by Jordan Zakarinabout Colin Hanks and his plans to create a documentary about the rise and fall of an institution thatâs near and dear to many of usâ¦. Tower Records. Colin wants to tell the story of how one little drug store/record shop grew into a mammoth empire, known all over the world. Of course, digital technology and music downloading may have doomed Tower no matter what, but that doesnât change the fact that weâve lost a piece of our youth, our character⦠ certainly here in Sacramento. The project is being funded through Kickstarter, and itâs pretty easy to contribute to the cause.
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I guess the Major League All Star Game doesnât carry the same weight as it did in the days of Henry Aaron, Mickey Mantle, Roberto Clemente and Willie Mays. Some guys just donât seem to want to play. They need the rest instead. I understand. But this time, Iâm gonna see FIVE Giants introduced, along with Giants skipper Bruce Bochy and his staff. While itâs great to see Matt Cain, Tim Lincecum and Brian Wilson make the roster, last minute addition Pablo Sandoval has really got to be in seventh heaven. The kid nearly ate himself out of a job last season, and rode the bench a lot during that memorable post season run to the Championship. But I think the best story is Ryan Vogelsong, the washed up big leaguer who was cut, toiled in mediocrity in the Japanese League⦠and was a walk-on in spring training. I imagine Giants fans will have goose bumps when heâs introduced tomorrow night. Ryan Vogelsong is an All Star.
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With the help of the Food Network shows and other exposure, thereâs no shortage of Food Truck entrepreneurs⦠and fans these days.   And this despite downtown Sacramentoâs strict ordinances against the kind of mobile foodie scene you might find in Portland, San Francisco or LA. Thanks to Chris Maciasof the Bee,  I understand that the newly formed Sacramento Food Truck Alliance has started to organize weekly festivals, slightly beyond the downtown limits. Thursday night spots have included Tognottiâs Auto Worldâs parking lot⦠and tonightâs edition (from 5 - 8pm)  will be at Mel Rapton Honda on Fulton, near the Capital City Freeway. Local vendors will include Mini Burger, Drewskiâs Hot Rod Kitchen, Mama Kim, Chandoâs Tacos and the Leaven & Earth Sandwich Co. Hey, that sounds like some good eatin.â
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We love the Fourthâ¦. but it can be a dangerous holiday. Nearly 15,000 people are hurt by fireworks each year.. more than half the victims are kids and up to 40 percent are bystanders. Last year the US consumer Product Safety Commission reported 9,500 fireworks-related emergency-room visits, most of these in July. Bottle rockets account for the majority of all fireworks injuries â most often injuring the eyes. They can move as fast as 200 mph, explode in mid air and fly in any direction. Sparklers are the second highest cause of fireworks injuries. Most of these occur among preschool-age children. Sparklers accounted for about one third of the injuries to kids under five. So letâs have a fun, safe holiday weekend. Incendiary devices, huge amounts of alcoholâ¦. and an open flame. What could possibly go wrong?
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Weâre inundated with information about healthy eating⦠better nutrition, low sodium and fat free choices⦠Okay, we get it.  Still, many of us have a fascination with this Fourth of July traditionâ¦NathanâsFamous Hot Dog Eating Contest. Yeah, itâs overindulgence to the max, and I canât explain why Iâm drawn to this âquease-festâ each year.   World ChampionJoey âJawsâ Chestnut ate 54 hot dogs in ten minutes last year, and heâll return to defend his crown. But the superstar eater  (competing in the new Womenâs Division this year) who always fascinates me is Sonya Thomas,known affectionately as The Black Widow. The woman weighs 98 pounds! Last fall she set a world record by eating 181 chicken wings in 12 minutes, besting Joey Chestnut. Sheâs also the World Oyster Eating Champion, once downing 46 dozen oysters in 10 minutes. I canât even walk by a cheeseburger without gaining 4 pounds, but she can consume the contents of a buffet, smile about it and still look petite.  I tell you, life isnât fair.Â
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The Giants scored 19 runs yesterday in their doubleheader sweepof the struggling Cubs while pumping out 30 hits. That sounds like a cruel joke⦠or a misprint. Thatâs more production than they had during their entire homestand. I mean, arenât these the guys who go 0 for 40 with runners in scoring position? Who canât produce a sacrifice fly if their lives depended on it? Who force their pitchers to throw shutout ball for 8 innings⦠then hope for a bases loaded balk? Obviously, the World Champions have exceeded their allotment of runs and hits, and may face sanctions from Major League Baseball. So don't look for them to score more than one run a game through at least Labor Day. In other words, weâll be back to normal.
Iâm sure youâve heard the latest on Ron Artest. No, he didnât beat anyone up, drive off the road or thank his psychiatrist again. Heâs decided to change his name.. to Metta World Peace. While I certainly appreciate the sentiment, I never thought there was a thing wrong with the name Ron. But hey, Mr. Artest has always been a littleâ¦. different, and heâs entitled to call himself whatever he wants. Iâm just waiting for that game changing moment in the fourth quarter when we hearâ¦âand thereâs a Flagrant Foul on World Peace!ââ¦.
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Has it really been that long ago that the big hitters hit like men? I mean didnât guys in the heart of the lineup have averages like  .317 or .331? Tappers who were struggling to hit .245 rode the pine or were farmed out to the minors. Of course Iâm probably overreacting because the Giants are soanemic in this critical area. I know, theyâre near the bottom in average, runs scored, runs batted inâ¦. and are nearly impotent with runners in scoring position. And theyâre battling for first place in the division? Hilarious. If they didnât have decent pitching, theyâd be six games behind the Padres, who are now in last place. I donât have an explanation for this, but Iâve gotta believe that .250 is the new .300. The Giants actually have starters who are hitting around .200⦠and worse. If they could acquire someone who could hit .255, heâd be called a âslugger,â and heâd bat in the four hole.   How about .275? Thatâs Hall of Fame material. I kind of miss Jim Ray Hartâ¦
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Looks like it took Hugh Hefner about 45 minutes to find love again. Yeah, after the Runaway Bride, Crystal Harris left him at the altar, he wasnât despondent for very long. According to TMZ(and how can you not believe them?), his new babe is Playmate Anna Sophia Berglund⦠that would be Miss January 2011. At least Anna is a lot closer to Hefâs age. Sheâs 24 days older than Crystal.Â
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Itâs been part of our viewing pleasure, practically since baseball was first televised. Itâs the centerfield camera shot. You know⦠where we get to see the pitcher, the batter, the ump and the strike zone. At least once a game, Iâll be thinkingâ¦. âYouâve gotta be kidding me⦠Canât you hit that?â or.. âCanât you throw a strike?â Well, from the pitcherâs perspective, it looks like you ought to be able to get it over the plate. From the hitter's perspective, it looks like you should at least make contact.  Neither are true. I believe if most people stood on the pitcherâs mound, that strike zone would appear to be about the size of a first class stamp. Yeah, there are plenty of places the ball will goâ¦. that are not in the strike zone. And Iâm very sure that if you stood in the batterâs box, connecting with a 96 mph cutter would be the least of your problemsâ¦. âcuz I doubt you would even see the ball. Well, I guess thatâs why they call it The Big Leaguesâ¦
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I suppose if security guard Frank Wills hadnât noticed tape on the locks at the Watergate Complex, history might have been different. It was on this day in 1972 that the Watergate burglers were arrested at the Democratic National Committee Headquartersâ¦. which led to one of the great political scandals of its time, and brought down the Nixon Presidency. It made household names of Woodward and Bernstein, played by Robert Redford and Dustin Hoffman in the classic All The Presidentâs Men. Itâs a film that managed to  create suspense and riveting drama, even though we all knew the ending. To me, the âdirty tricksâ of that era seem tame, compared to what we see and hear now. The rhetoric has changed, hasnât it?
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Kirk Gibson has the Arizona Diamondbacks playing well, and it looks like theyâll be a force in the NL West all year. They come at you with solid pitching, speed and plenty of bats up and down that line up. But there was a moment that gave it away. A moment that screamed âWeâre Not Worthy.â The other night, Miguel Monterohit a monster blast off of Matt Cain⦠a three run homer that cut a 5-1 deficit to 5-4 in one loud instant. Fans in the half-filled stadium cheered⦠then when Montero crossed home plate, everybody sat down and got quiet. I couldnât believe it. Had Pat Burrelljacked one out in similar fashion at sold-out AT & T Park, the place would have levitated. It would have been so loud, you couldnât hear yourself think. But not in Arizona. Youâre playing the World Champions for the NL lead⦠and half of beautiful Chase Field is empty? Whatâs wrong.. is it too hot? Thatâs no excuse⦠this is the Big Leagues. And youâve got air conditioning. Oh, itâs a retirement community? That explains it. I guess the âearly bird buffetâ can really put a damper on attendance. I canât say as I blame you there.
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Yeah, the U2 show in Oakland was a big deal. But not everybody was happy. Apparently some fans are upset about missing much of the bandâs performance because of traffic.  The lengthy traffic jam into the Oakland Coliseum turned the trip into a five hour journey for some. And you could see it comin.â As we are Litigation Nation, now there are concert goers who are threatening to sueâ¦. somebody. Maybe sue the police, the City of Oakland, Cal Trans⦠or even that conniving Bono. I can certainly see why.  Traffic backed up in the Bay Area? Thatâs never happened beforeâ¦. Hilarious.
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So thereâs money in baggage check-in⦠lots of it. For the second consecutive year, Delta Airlines took in more baggage fees (nearly a Billion Dollars) than any other US carrier. All told, the countryâs biggest airlines pulled in $3.4 Billion last year from fees charged to fliers for checking their bags. I guess once you pay $150 to check a bag, that becomes the going rate. One airline spokesperson said, âIt is part of the business model that is, more or less, here to stay.â Which is airline-speak for âWow, this is a gold mine.â As ridiculous as it sounds, I wonder if itâs cheaper to mail your clothes to your destination⦠then mail them back?
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Jason Whitlockof Fox Sports just called LeBron James âa laughingstock, a late-night punch line. Heâs Charlie Brown.â Oh man, this is gonna be good. I have to admit, I kind of enjoyed seeing the Miami arrogance get busted. And weâve all seen LeBron promise âNot One, Not Two, Not Three Championships etc.ââ¦Â  Well, for the moment youâre right. Itâs Not One Championshipâ¦. itâs ZERO. And itâs not all LeBronâs fault, though many will call him a choker. Dallas simply rose to the occasion⦠because thatâs what good teams do in the NBA Finals. Yeah, the Heat may get their seven Championships one dayâ¦. but for now, the paradeâs in Dallas.
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Sometimes things donât go the way theyâre supposed to. Just about every NBA ââexpertâ has been babbling on for weeks about how the Miami Heat will crush anyone in their path to the Championship. Yeah, youâre right⦠theyâre too good. Come on, LeBron James and Dwyane Wade are getting fitted for rings now. The Mavs are losers.. and always have been, and so on and so forth. But things are getting a little tense in Miami, arenât they? Dallas, with Dirk-somebody has takena 3-2 lead. Thatâs an outrage. Well, it wonât be The Heat in 4, 5, or 6 anymore, will it? Guess theyâll have to settle for winning it all in Seven. Thatâs why they play the game.Â
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Some people seem to hate everything. Like itâs a case of chronic âput-down-itis.â Weâve all seen this on blogs, Twitter, Facebook⦠any comments section. It doesnât take much for someone to be accused of being stupid, or worse. My favorite is âWho Cares?â Obviously, you just wasted 30 seconds of your life clicking on something you donât care about, and youâll never get that back. Why donât you reinvest your time in something you do care about? Like helping seniors⦠giving teachers a hand⦠picking up litter. And how âbout thisâ¦Â Weâll come to your job and hang out for a while. And when you tell us what it is you do, weâll all say âWho Cares?â
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Of course his âMidnight Rideâis a legendary part of American history. This Revolutionary patriot and military officer was also a supremely gifted craftsmanâ¦. a silversmith. When Paul Revereâsname came up this week, I recalled a visit to the nationâs capitol with my wife, which included a little tour of the Diplomatic Reception Rooms at the State Department. There on a shelf were these magnificent silver chalices, handmade by Paul Revere. They were stunning in their simplicity and beauty. Since I had been on my feet all day, I was about to plop down on a little wooden chair in the middle of the room. Just then, the tour guide saysâ¦âAnd here⦠ are a table and chair, used by Thomas Jefferson .â Yikes, whatâs that worth.. 20 million dollars? Priceless, I know. No, I didnât sit there. But I almost did.
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Iâve got to hand it to the golfers. Of course they love to play the great courses⦠and boy, do they do their homework. The Ridge, the spectacular layout in the hills of Auburn, has made its debut in SacPerks. Originally a one-day deal, this stellar offer has been extended⦠for a little while, so youâd better jump on it. Acquire a $50 certificate for The Ridge, good for golf, gear or grub⦠for $25 now. Having enjoyed the pristine course, the pro shop and the wonderful hospitality in the bar and restaurant, I can tell you this is the deal of the summerâ¦. assuming we ever get a summer. Go out and enjoy yourself⦠and thanks for checking out SacPerks.
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He may have been TVâs greatest lawman. At 6 feet 6, he was certainly the tallest. James Arness, who presided over Dodge City as Marshal Matt Dillon in the legendary Gunsmoke,passed away last week at age 88. Nowadays, shows donât last 20 episodes⦠Gunsmoke was in our living rooms for twenty years. Oh, he was bigger than life⦠and he hardly said a word. He made Clint Eastwood sound like a blabbermouth. The Marshal let his presence.. and that long barrel six shooter do the talkin.â And how âbout that cast? His trusty deputy, Chester Goode, the wise old Doc Adams, Festus Haggen⦠and of course the ravishing Miss Kitty. Gunsmoke may have been TVâs last great western, and itâs been off the air for nearly 40 years. But Jim Jobe and I were fans, and weâll never forget it. Rest in peace, big guy.
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Saw a story byEmma Barnett about an Oakland guy who got his stolen MacBook back. Itâs how he got it back thatâs pretty cool. He remembered that heâd installed an anti-theft app called Hidden. The app took pictures of the crook every time he turned it on.. and sent them directly to the MacBookâs rightful owner, who then posted each photo on his blog, ThisGuyHasMyMacBook.tumblr.com. It took a while, but this week, the Oakland police tracked down the thief, and made an arrest. Nice work.
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Apparently the authorities are coming to grips with the seedy underbelly of Danville, Iowa. The cops have dropped the hammer on anillegal mouse racingoperation in a local bar. Scott Beach, owner of the Bucktail Lodge, said âWe donât consider it gambling at all, itâs just people having fun. The money goes back to themâ¦â And itâs not like the mice become appetizers or something⦠theyâre family pets when theyâre not in their racing mode. Well, I suppose wagering on animals who are forced to run all-out to the finish line is a cruel spectacle. Oh wait.. isnât it time to get some money down on the Belmont Stakes?
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According to a recent study, when people do not get enough sleep, they tend to make overly optimistic decisions and may be more prone to risky gambling. So let me see if I understand this. Fatigue  makes you a terrible gambler? No s##t? And what exactly is ârisky gambling?â Isnât that redundant? I guess thatâs why casinos are always open⦠and there never seem to be any clocks on the wall.  No one comes around and says⦠âoh, weâre about to close.â Who wants some coffee?
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You were wise to get your VIP All Access badges earlyâ¦. CHP is turning away anyone who doesnât have tickets for the Eagleâs 4-day extravaganza, the largest gathering of Classic Rock performers at one venue⦠for one weekend.  Traffic has been backed up on Keller Canyon Road since 3am, as you might imagine. Your VIP badge will get you into all the backstage meet and greets, into the 5-star lobster buffet, all of the Dos Equis hospitality suitesâ¦. and will allow you complimentary  helicopter shuttles into and out of Keller Meadow. Oh, and donât miss out on the 45 minute blimp ride over the valley in the Pink Floyd airship. Theyâre being offered from 11a to 4p each day of Woodsquawk. Just flash your VIP badge and youâre welcome aboard.
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The furious, dramatic rally the Giants pulled off to tie the game seemed like an afterthought. The soul of their team, young Buster Posey, was writhing in pain after a devastating collision at the plate. The sellout crowd fell silent, as if a black cloud had descended on the parkâ¦as if Buster was the only thing that matteredâ¦. because he was. As someone in the clubhouse was heard to say..âItâs way serious.â Thereâs no denying it⦠Buster Posey wonât be catching for the Giants any time soon. So what now? Do you kiss off the rest of the season? Only losers do that. Itâs time for the players⦠and the fans⦠to suck it up. Panda will return soon⦠maybe he continues to pound the ball. Brandon Belt has to contribute, just as Buster did exactly a year ago as an unproven rookie. Better at-bats⦠clutch hitting⦠keep the line moving. No time to hang your heads. Rededicate yourself.  Win this for your catcherâ¦. the soul of your team.
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If youâll permit me a personal note, I can tell you that my brother and I have been dealing with elder care. I know weâre not alone, as this has got to be one of the front line issues of our generation. And you may already know that dealing with the particulars of benefits, extended care and insurance is all-consuming. Gleaning the right information in this maze of bureaucracy can be confusing, complicated and contradictory. Thatâs why Iâm glad we found Deborah Short, ofPlanning For Seniors. Sheâs been an invaluable consultant for us and for some of our best friends. Deb is Katâs guest on The Eagle this Sunday morning⦠6:30 â 7:00am.
So the Warriors have brought in a guy. Not just any guy. Theyâve securedthe services of Hall of Famer Jerry West,whoâll now join their executive board. Yeah, thereâs a reason Jerry West is the model for the NBA logo.. heâs a badass. I know heâs had a long career as an exec, but in ancient times, oh he could play. I was shocked that his bio lists him as 6â 2â⦠because he was a giant on the court.   When he starred with the Lakers, I once saw him cross half court, take a dribble and hit nothing but net. Then he did it again. In those days, there was no three-point line⦠and I wonder how many points he would have accumulated had there been one. So Jerry West is a Warrior. Sounds weird. Theyâll get used to it.
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Every team has the talent to come from behind and steal a win. But come on⦠The Giants have been doing it practically every night. Nate Schierholtz, Darren Ford, Manny Burriss, Cody Ross, Aubrey Huff⦠coming through when all hope seems to be lost. And speaking of talent, letâs face itâ¦..itâs not like the Giants are stacked with an All-Star caliber lineup. Maybe thatâs why so few âexpertsâ pick this team to even make the playoffs. Theyâre still being underestimated⦠and thatâs why we love âem. The Misfits are back. Oh, and to that person whoâs inventing a revolutionary catcherâs helmetâ¦Â please roll one out for Buster.
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Nate Schierholtz showed off his rifle arm the other night by throwing out a guy at second, but last nightâs game-ending catch against the Dodgers was unreal⦠maybe the defensive play of the year. Stop what youâre doing check it out here. Aubrey Huff said, âThank God that wasnât me.â No kidding. Is there any doubt as to who ought to be patrolling right field? And the stellar play preserved Madison Bumgarnerâs first win of the year. Coming into the game 0-6, had Bum let another one get away, he would have gone straight to South America and joined the priesthood.Â
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Is the Governator a scumbag?  You think?  I donât believe anyone is surprised that heâs a cheater. What continues to spread this story like wildfire are all of the other issues. We know the mistressâs identity and faceâ¦. Not only are there plenty of photos of her hitting the net, but of her 13-year-old boy as well. This happened before he became Governor, a fact that was obviously kept secret during Ms. Baenaâs 20 year tenure as family housekeeper. And there are others apparently ready to cash in on Arnoldâs infidelity. And this unspeakable humiliation happened to Maria Shriver,one of the highest profile women in American politics. Ms. Shriverâs statement read.. âThis is a painful and heartbreaking time. As a mother, my concern is for the children. I ask for compassion, respect and privacy as my children and I try to rebuild out lives and heal. I will have no further comment.â Respect and privacy? With the sleazebag nature of so many âreportingâ sites, I know itâs too late for that. And America eats it up. With all thatâs occurring in the world, one local station actually led the newscast with the âBreaking Newsâ of the housekeeperâs identity.  Pathetic.
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According to Boston.com,a prisoner in Oklahoma took his love of NBA legend Larry Bird a little too far. In 2005, when Eric Torpy was sentenced to a 30-year prison sentence for armed robbery and two counts of shooting with intent to kill, he asked the judge to tack on three more years. Thatâs right⦠he didnât want to do 30 years. He wanted to do 33 years.. because Larry Birdâs jersey number was 33. Now, Mr. Torpy thinks that was a bad move. âNow that I have to do that time,â says Torpy, âI kind of wished that I had 30 instead of 33. Recently Iâve wisened upâ¦.â Really? I donât want to jump to conclusions here but⦠I think we can be pretty sure.. anything âwiseâ doesnât fit your profileâ¦
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It was a dream of the late restaurateur Frank Fat to create a celebration of Asian cultures⦠their diversity, richness and cuisine. That dream became the Pacific Rim Street Fest, now celebrating 19 years in Old Sacramento and beyond. Thereâs dancing, music, cultural demonstrations.. and of course, the scrumptious street food. Donât miss specialties from the Lumpia Hut, California Fats, and Aloha Diner, just to name a few. Admission is free this Sunday from 10a to 5p.. in Old Sacramento and Westfield Downtown Plaza. Iâve seen the Pacific Rim Festival survive rainstorms and 95 degree heat. With a little luck, this Sunday will be a perfect time to enjoy the Asian Pacific heritage.... the sights, the sounds⦠and some Mongolian BBQ.
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According to a report confirmed by ABC News, a load of porn was found among the trove of evidence sized from the compound of Osama bin Laden. The porn stash, which one US official said was âhuge,â was found in a wooden box in bin Ladenâs bedroom and included electronically recorded videos. And Andy Borowitz reports that on Capitol Hill, calls faded for the release of pictures of bin Laden, but there was increased pressure for the release of his extensive porn collection. He added that according to CIA director Leon Panetta, there were still many unanswered questions about Mr. Bin Ladenâs porn stash, âlike how he kept it hidden with three wives in the house.â
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If you read theheadlines today, California is in such a budget crisis, it makes you wonder how we got ourselves into this much trouble.  Itâs an outrage. I know itâs complicated, and smart people are supposed to be in charge, but everything we hear is depressing.  So hereâs my plan:
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Everyone who blames every single problem on state workers has to cough up an extra $1500.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Every passenger who brings way too much stuff on board an airplane contributes $3500 more in taxes.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Every âfanâ whoâs drunk, profane, rude and obnoxious at ballgames is on the hook for $5000 per incident.
-       And those who habitually cut people off on the freeway and laugh about it⦠will have their cars impounded and sold on eBay, with the money going to the state.Â
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â With these modest proposals in place, I believe weâll be in the black in about 48 hours.Â
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Yeah, they were feeling confidentâ¦. ahead in the series 3-0, and ready to close it out. But no, it started to slip away.   All the talking heads said the same thing.. âOh, donât let it get to a seventh game.â Well, here we are. I know the Red Wings have tradition, a great history. We get it. But that doesnât matter now. If the Sharks donât win the series at home tonight, that ugly âCâ word will be in every headline tomorrow. Theyâll be forever referred to as the chokers of 2011, deserved or not. So that cannot happen. Do what youâve been doing all season, call upon your skill and toughness⦠and suck it up. Get it done tonight and letâs move on. Please.
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When Tim Lincecum takes the hill tonight, heâll do so as the Giants pitcher with the most double-digit strikeout games in franchise history. The Giants ace recorded his 29th game with at least 10 strikeouts last week against the Mets. He didnât pass Carl Hubbell or Gaylord Perry or Juan Marichal. No, he surpassed a record held byChristy Mathewson. Yeah, that Christy Mathewson.. the great New York Giants star of the early 1900s, and one of the âFirst Fiveâ inductees into the Baseball Hall of Fame. Just to have your name in the same sentence as Christy Mathewson has got to be humbling. I imagine young Tim, who wonât be 27 until next month, realizes that. Nice work, Timmy. By the way, Mathewsonâs career stats are mind-boggling. He won 373 games, threw 79 shutouts, won 20 games 13 timesâ¦. and won 30 games four times. And thatâs why heâs on baseballâs Mount Rushmoreâ¦
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Whoâs that? Peja? Oh, heâs shooting for Dallas! Every time he drained a three, I couldnât help but think that he sent some Kings fans into a major state of arousal. Nope, I was sure the Lakers would come back, as they had done so many times before. Come on⦠theyâre the two-time defending champions. But noooâ¦not this time. You got punked⦠swept in four. So there wonât be any fawning over Kobe, for a little while anyway. And how âbout the player ejections for those thuggish fouls? Nice walk-off Lakersâ¦. gutless and heartless. Stay classy.
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For me, he was and always will be⦠the greatest ever. Hall of Famer Willie Mays celebrates his 80th birthday today. A recent biography,  Willie Mays: The Life, The Legend, by James Hirsch, is a must read. When I was a kid, there was a made-for-TV documentary, A Man Named Mays⦠that aired on network television in the fall of 1963. Iâd forgotten it was scheduled, and I only caught a few minutes of it. In those ancient times, shows only aired once⦠and if you missed it, you were out of luck. I did and I was... a regret I carried all of my life.   And these many years later, I realized that even the most obscure program might be found on the internet. Well, I found it, acquired it.. and I cherish it. A DVD of the 1963 documentary A Man Named Mays can be found at Rare Sports Films.Â
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You have to wonder if one of Americaâs greatest presidents could withstand the scrutiny in todayâs ratings-grabbing, hysterical, polarized political climate. I can hear the bimbos on pseudo-news nowâ¦. âIsnât it true that you quit school at 13?â âWe understand that you never personally joined a church.. just what religion are you?â âMany are wondering⦠about your nutty wife⦠and is that why youâve battled depression?â âAnd were you born in Kentucky or Illinois? Which is it? And can you prove it?â Voters have a clear choice⦠Abraham Lincoln..Unfit To Lead.
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Thereâs a story in the New York Postabout a pretty adventurous prom date. Texas teen Ben Ross must have told his girl he had the biggestâ¦. well, that she would be impressed. I imagine she was, when he showed up with a 27-foot long sausage. Yup, he picked her up in the famous Oscar Mayer Wienermobile. Ben was injured in a motorcycle accident last month and had joked with his mom in the hospital that heâd like to ride the big wienie to the big dance⦠and she arranged to have that happen. Must have been a special night. Nice work.
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Along with a lot of 49er fans, I follow Matt Maiocco, whoâs great at uncovering plenty of juicy Niner Nuggets. Even with the dark cloud hanging over the upcoming season, there was plenty to get excited about as the NFL draftplayed out over the weekend.  Yeah, their first round pick, Aldon Smithis someone to watchâ¦. but thereâs major buzz on Nevada quarterback Colin âThe Cannonâ Kaepernick. And now, Matt writes that Alex Smith will be back! Yikes. The same Alex Smith who was practically ushered out of Candlestick at the end of last year? The same Alex who got booed for every third down incompletion? Heâs not officially signed yet, but we know that new head coach Jim Harbaugh has given Alex⦠a playbook! You canât get those at Wal-Mart. Can you imagine the redemption angle⦠the resurrection story should Alex Smith actually succeed? I canât believe I just said that. Iâd better get a drink.
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Only about 10,000 came out to the Mobile Food Fest on Saturday. Yikes. Some lines required a two hour wait. I know thatâs a little much. You wouldnât wait 25 minutes for a table at a restaurant⦠but youâll wait two hours to get a sizzling mini-burger. Hilarious. To say the least, I think weâre ready for a mobile food scene, like the ones thriving in cities like Portland, San Francisco and LA. Some argue that food trucks hurt the brick-and-mortar restaurants. Well, on Saturday, some restaurants had more business than usual.  Why? Because there are thousands upon thousands of hungry foodies who came downtown to eat⦠duh! Donât you think itâs time to revisit these city ordinances? Letâs see, the Kings are staying⦠and street food rocks. Things are lookinâ up.
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When I heard that a couple of BILLION people were expected to tune in to at least some part of the Royal Wedding coverage, I thought that was ridiculous. Not me. Not gonna do it. Then it happened. My wife had it on this morning, and I had no choice. So I was wrong⦠I succumbed. Gorgeous wedding, I must say. And Kate Middleton⦠does she look like a movie star or what? In the moment I tuned in, I saw a couple of things that were pretty cool. The Prince and his bride were in a convertible⦠and HE was doing the driving. Oh, and the helicopter that flew over with the banner that read⦠âGo Giants!â Â
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Clutter is a funny thing. I saw a story in the Daily Mail that suggests that after spending years trying to cut down on clutter, some stores are stacking stuff in the middle of aisles again. Why? To improve sales. Yikes. Apparently, the prevailing wisdom  is⦠the more a store is packed, the messier and more confusing it looks, the better the deals it projects. We hear that Wal-Mart, Old Navy and Best Buy are looking at crowding shelf space  and adding more products down aisles. I guess the more stuff thatâs out there, the more people want to buy it. Of course, Americans are kind of obsessed with clutter anyway. Letâs say you have a trailer full of junk thatâs headed to the landfill. If you unload the trailer⦠and put the same junk in neat rows on your lawnâ¦. donât you now have a Yard Sale?
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Are we becoming a nation of wussies? Or are we already there? Saw a story in HolyTaco.comthat reported that the state of New York has recently released a new list of âdangerousâ activities that summer camps need to keep out of their programs. A few things on the list: Dodgeball, Wiffle Ball and Kickball. Too dangerous? Lawn darts I can understand. Shooting BBs at each other?⦠okay, I get it. But Dodgeball? Of course youâll get popped in the nogginâ a few times. But it builds character. I used to love Dodgeball⦠and I lived. For Godâs sakes, take a hit once in a while. Let me tell you somethinâ kidâ¦Â If Wiffle Ball is kickinâ your ass, Iâve got some bad news for you⦠about life.
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No question, Guy Fieri and Dinerâs, Drive-Ins and Dives can put you on the map. In recent episodes, the searing national spotlight has shone brightly on some Sacramento favorites. The Squeeze Innhas become a historical landmark. And you might be able to putJamieâson Broadway and their outrageous prime rib on that list. What about Gatsbyâs Dineron Alta Arden? Iâll bet people are talkinâ about their pork chops in Chicago. Was that a shot of Freeport Blvd? Oh, thatâs Dadâs Kitchennear McClatchy High.   I can imagine thereâs a line out the door for those scrumptious, bacon-infused burgers. And thatâs just a sample of the local spots that have been proudly featured. With all due respect to the high end chefs at the snooty restaurants, I love the men and women who toil in diner kitchens. Theyâre workinâ 16 hour days, and are as creative, skillful and daring as anyone when it comes to serving up comfort food nirvana. No wonder theyâre having a love fest with their regulars. Well done.
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The LA Times had a story about a four-year-old murder investigation, the trail of which had gone cold. As homicide investigator Kevin Lloyd was flipping through snapshots of tattooed gang members, he noticed something. Inked on the chest of a gangster⦠was the entire scene of a liquor store slaying, and reference to the gangsterâs own involvement. Thatâs right, an intricate, detailed tattoo became a compelling, silent witness to murder. Another investigation would eventually result in a confession⦠and last weekâs first degree murder conviction. Robert Faturechiâs story is here.
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Just when you thought the Kings were out the door, the town goes Purple. This may be too little, too late but Iâve got to admit⦠seeing Mayor Kevin Johnson playing host to a bunch of suits from the NBA is pretty exciting. Is there actually some shred of hope that the Aloofs⦠ah, the Maloofs,  would NOT be able to exit Sacramento? Too early to tell. Sam Amickposted a terrific story in SI.com that seems to indicate the battle for the Kings is not over. My favorite passage.. âsources say the Anaheim presentation given at the meetings was as ineffective as Johnsonâs was impactfulâ¦â Thatâs hilarious. Stay tuned.
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Baseball fans probably caught this story about Eddie Cicotte, one of the infamous Black Soxbanned from baseball after their tainted World Series in 1919. According to court documents from 1920, Eddie sort of hints that there was talk about theCubs throwing the 1918 World Seriesagainst the Boston Red Sox. No names, no evidence⦠just a little speculation after all these years. And boy, we love to speculate. We canât ask Eddie about it because he died in 1969. And of course it doesnât change the fact that the Chicago Cubs havenât won the World Series since 1908. If the 1918 fix is true, these poor Cubs fans will be able to say (just as White Sox fans once did)⦠âWeâve thrown one since weâve won oneâ¦â
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The bad news is⦠Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne owed the IRS some money in back taxes. A lot of money⦠like $1.7 million. The good news is.. they can pay it. Like most good citizens, they didnât run from their obligation, they made good on their debt this week. I guess just because you make a ton of money, it doesnât necessarily mean you know how to keep tabs on it. Apparently their accountant has been Mr. Magoo.
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Save Monday night, April 25 for the dogs. TheSacramento Sheriff K9 Association is hosting their annual K9 Comedy Night Fundraiser at the Punchline Comedy Club,  and your support will help raise funds for the medical expenses of the K9 Associationâs retired K9s. Three comics will be on the bill for this adults-only evening, and tickets are just $15. The headliner is Michael Mancini, the guy Jay Leno called âFunniest Cop Alive.â How can you go wrong with that? The Punchline is at 2100 Arden Way (Howe Bout Arden Shopping Center). Doors open at 7p.. show time is 8. For tickets, go to ssdk9.com/shopping.
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It was an unforgettable night at AT & T Park when the Giants players, coaches and staff were presented with their World Series rings. Apparently there are rules about this sort of thing. From what I can gather, everyone who was on the roster for the 2010 season is entitled to a ring. Wow. That means Brandon Medders, John Bowker, Joe Martinez, Todd Wellemeyer, Matt Downs⦠ all get rings. Yeah, each guy contributed in some way. I know the Giants are classy but⦠Freddie Lewis gets a ring? He never played an inning, as he was on the DL, then got traded. A ring for Jose Guillen? Thatâs borderline. How âbout this⦠Freddie Lewis and Jose Guillen should get a World Series ring. One ring. Kind of like a time share. You get it one weekend, I get it the next. Plenty of time to show it off at parties and barbecues. Then give it back.
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This time, Barry didnât get a walk. Itâs a convictionon a single count of obstruction of justice. The jurors couldnât decide on the perjury stuff. Well, actually on one of the perjury counts, they did decideâ¦. except for a lone holdout. I donât want to minimize the judicial process, but this is an awful lot of time, effort, testimony, migraine inducing research and money⦠for this result. In the end, it was determined that Barry Bonds was evasive. Yikes.. thatâs some breaking news. And, as in life⦠a group of people arenât always on the same page, are they? Matter of fact, I donât think you can get 12 people to agree that the sun goes down at night.
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Wouldnât you know it.. the last nightwill be filled with Lakers fans. You donât think theyâll rub it in our faces do you? Well, what can you do? What is likely to be the Kings final game in Sacramento will elicit plenty of emotions, not just at the arena but for thousands of fans watching the broadcast. Anger, sadness, pride, futility, frustration, loss⦠yeah, we feel all of that. Near the end of âThe Cincinnati Kid,âLadyfingers asks.. âYou still playinâ Kid?â He says softly.. âNo, Iâm through.â
Itâs National Poetry Month and something pretty cool is planned for Thursday night, April 14 at the newly refurbished and expanded Crocker Art Museum. Itâs the Art Mix:  Lit Fix program, going on from 5 â 9pm, with spoken word and live music performances by a number of local artists.   Our own James Lee Jobe, whoâs a kingpin among Sacramento poets, will be on the bill. And Sacramentoâs Poet Laureate, Bob Stanley will be accompanied on blues guitar by my brother, Robert Nakashimaâ¦and Johnny Kwock of the Soul Prophets. Iâm bringingâ my friends, and I invite you to bring yours. The program is free with Crocker admission, which is $10 for adults.Â
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I guess the sad truth is that Marcos Bretonis right, when he wrote âIf the Kings leave Sacramento after 26 years, itâs not because any one person is at fault or the community failed. The NBA simply doesnât work in Sacramentoâ¦â Weâre a small market, not enough corporate money, no mega TV deal⦠the same story weâve heard over and over again about cities not named New York, LA or Miami. And as the final games play out in what will likely be the last Kings season in Sacramento, I realize that they really have left a legacy. Come on, the thrilling moments⦠with Vlade, CWebb, Mike Bibby, the Conference Finals.. are too many to count. And when it was so loud at Arco you couldnât even think.. well that just doesnât happen everywhere. So it doesnât matter if you move to Anaheim, Kansas City, Jackson Hole or the Ukraine⦠youâll never have fans like youâve had in Sacramento. 26 years. All in all, itâs been a pretty good run.
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How do you feel about jury duty? Saw this item from the New York Daily News. Apparently a young woman who thought she could get out of jury duty by making outrageous racist statements.. got a little more than she bargained for. Rather than dismiss her, Judge Nicolas Garufis called her on the carpet. Addressing the court, he said, âSheâs coming back tomorrow, Thursday and Friday⦠and until the future, whenever I am ready to dismiss her.â Thatâs what Iâm talkinâ about⦠eternal jury duty. A little harsh? Of course. But come on, that is damned entertaining.
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It only took Alain Robert, whoâs known as Spiderman.. six hours to scale the worldâs tallest building, the Burj Khalifa in Dubai. Thatâs 2,717 feet, or more than a half mile straight up. He likes skyscrapers. Heâs climbed more than 70 of âem, including the Empire State Building, Chicagoâs Willis Tower and the Petronas Towers in Kuala Lumpur. In 2004, he scaled Taiwanâs Taipei 101, the worldâs tallest building at the time. Oh, heâs a daredevil all right. I think the only thing more dangerous⦠is actually starring in Spiderman The Musical.
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Giants fan Bryan Stow lies in a coma while battling life-threatening brain injuries after he was brutally assaultedin the Dodger Stadium parking lot. As much as I detest the Dodgers, even I canât believe the perpetrators are actual baseball fans. No, you are criminals, thugs⦠who deserve to be locked up for a long time. Though Iâm sure LAPD is on the case, why is this taking so long? This wasnât random violence in downtown LA⦠this was on stadium property immediately following a game. A hundred witnesses not enough for you? And what about security? I believe thereâs wall-to-wall surveillance for every inch of Walmart, Thunder Valley, or the local Shell station. But not for Chavez Ravine. And the tone coming from Dodgers officials seems to suggest that theyâre happy the majority of fans had a great time⦠and only a few were beaten. If the OâMalleys still owned the Dodgers, they wouldnât have stood for this. Iâm guessing those geniuses in the clown car run by the McCourts.. donât have a clue. At AT & T Park, the Giants will paytribute to Bryan Stow and collect donations on his behalf on April 11th, the series opener againstâ¦. the Dodgers.
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Dale Kasler and Ryan Lillis point out in the Beetoday that âif any place figures to get clobbered by the Kingsâ exit, it would be Natomas, the teamâs home since relocating from Kansas City in 1985.â Obviously a lot of businesses, especially restaurants and bars,  will feel the sting if all those fans donât have any games to go to. Letâs see...  thereâs Malabar, a Hooters, lots of taquerias, rib joints and sushi places that need to stay afloat in this dismal economy. The experts are making this too complicated.  Hereâs my plan. Every now and then, weâll get 17,000 former Kings fans to meet up near Truxel. Weâll take about $285.00 out of our wallets that would have represented tickets, parking, beers and snacks. Then weâll put the money back into our wallets⦠and go eat. Itâll feel like a bargain. Letâs start with some wings!
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You may have seen this story in the Boston Globe. In hopes of energizing the Boston Common, city officials have leased The Pink Palace to the Earl of Sandwich chain of restaurants. The 660 square foot structure has been around since the 1920s, and was originally built as a restroom. Thatâs quite a makeover. From toilet to eatery. At least theyâll be bringing in a new class of buns.
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My wife has a thing about âpull dates.â  You know what Iâm talking aboutâ¦Â if the food item says âbest before 4/10/11,â well we have to eat it. Safety, freshness, cooties⦠I get it. Generally, Iâm totally thrilled about pull dates. If itâs milk, chicken, a package of all-beef hot dogs⦠Iâll honor the date. But I draw the line at potato chips.   I have a bag of Krinkly Sour Cream and Cheddar that Iâve been saving, because it has a pull date of 3/31. That means tonight, it turns to poison, plutonium or radioactive sludge. But Iâm going to take the plunge⦠and lovingly eat them, throwing all caution to the wind. If Iâm not back on Monday, youâll know what happened.
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No one repeats as World Series Champions⦠at least thatâs the prevailing wisdom. But I wouldnât bet against these guys, as they finally begin to defend their title tonight in La-La Land against the hated Dodgers. Most of the Misfits return, and a young pup named Brandon Belt surprised everyone by making the opening day roster. If they struggle early, not to worry. âCuz theyâve come back. Seemed like Tim Lincecum was 0 for August last seasonâ¦. and Panda hit into two double plays before breakfast. Oh, and Buster Posey, Pat Burrell, Cody Ross, Javier Lopez and Madison Bumgarner werenât even on the team on Opening Day last year. Somehow, it all worked out, didnât it?  If you donât have Band of Misfitsby Giants beat writer Andrew Baggarly, get it.
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These days, we seem to be a society mesmerized with humiliation. Millions of viewers flock to see who gets run off of American Idol. Of course the Donald Trump Celebrity Dork-Fest speaks for itself⦠âYouâre Fired!â That little campfire on Survivor would determine who no longer deserves to live among civilized people. Biggest Loser, Food Network⦠same deal. Thanks for allowing us to get to know you⦠now get the hell out. On Dancing With The Stars, the big news is not who moves on⦠itâs who gets to take the walk of shame. Thanks for your weeks of sweat and putting your heart and soul on the line. Now get the hell out. At least in the brutal world of Radio, when someone gets let go, the memo says.. âWe wish him well in his future endeavors.â At least most of the time.
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Whenever I see these endless TV ads for prescription sleep medication, it reminds me of Chris Rock. Iâm paraphrasing here but I seem to recall him saying âYouâll get busted in a heartbeat for your drugs⦠but the pharmaceutical industry desperately wants you to buy their drugs.â  And doesnât it seem like the disclaimer lasts way too long? Oh yeah, side effects could include, but not be limited toâ¦Â high blood pressure, dizziness, pain, vomiting, decreased sex drive, diarrhea, hallucinations, breathing trouble, depression and suicidal thoughts. Consult your doctor⦠No s##t? Sounds like a good nightâs sleep to me.
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I caught Andy Rooney last night on 60 Minutes, who was talking about things that were once thought to be good for you...  are now bad. At least according to studies⦠whatever a study is. And stuff that was once bad for you is now okay. Diet sodas seemed like a good idea⦠now they could damage your health. Coffee used to cause cancer. Now, some say it could help your circulation. You get the idea. It reminded me of a story from SCNow.comthat claims researchers at Kansas State University have found that hot dogs are nearly free of many cancer causing chemicals that can be found in such âhealthyâ foods as grilled chicken. Now youâre talkinâ. Before they change their minds, I think Iâll grill up some Johnsonville Bratsâ¦. and slather on some serious peppers, onions and mustard. In the name of good health, of course.
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I came across a story by Lisa Johnson Mandellabout aDallas bank robberythat didnât go well⦠at least for the stick-up man. The headline read âCourageous Teller Asks Bank Robber for Two Forms of ID.â I kid you not. Of course you can say the teller risked her life and the lives of innocent people but come on⦠thatâs pretty cool.  Yes, as Mr. Robber eventually came up with two forms of identification, the teller stalled for time by copying the information⦠very slowly. Enough time for the authorities to arrive. Dangerous? Yes. Dumb criminal? I guess. Robbinâ banks ainât as easy as it used to beâ¦
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Natural disasters, whether they occur in South America, Eastern Europe, Haiti, Japanor anywhere in the world⦠leave thousands, or hundreds of thousands of innocent people suffering. All that you love, all that you hold dear⦠gone or changed forever in a matter of a few horrifying moments. I canât begin to comprehend the sense of loss and heartbreak for those in  Northern Japan, but the images of those victims are especially haunting to me. Because the faces look just like me. They look like my mom, my grandparents⦠my grandson. I donât personally know the names of any relatives in Japan, however distant, but certainly my bloodline is there⦠ thatâs the country of my ancestors. I canât help but feel closer to them now.
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And what an extraordinary life it was.   Sheâd been an icon for so long, I was surprised she was only 79 when she passed away this morning. I donât remember a world without the ravishing Liz Taylor. As the Associated Pressâs Bob Thomas wrote, she âwas a star at age 12, a bride and a divorcee at 18, a superstar at 19 and a widow at 26.â A two time Academy Award winner, she appeared in more than 50 films, from the childrenâs classic National Velvet to Whoâs Afraid of Virginia Woolf⦠to the epic Cleopatra. But her most mesmerizing role may have been⦠her real life. Blessed and cursed, loved and hated⦠but always the center of attention. She and Richard Burton were the Brad and Angelina of their time, and her eight marriages to seven men provided at least as much drama as any of her starring film roles. One thing for certain⦠there will never be another Elizabeth Taylor. Rest in Peace young lady.
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Thereâs a little eatery on Greenback, but it might as well be in the Bronx.  The first time I walked into Samâs Kosher-Style Restaurant and Deliwith my friends, it felt like we stepped into a time warp. And whatâs wrong with that?  The vinyl booths, the pastrami being sliced behind the counter, even the style of the cups and saucers⦠brought to mind that comfy 50s ambiance. And a lot of patrons have described the âsoul foodâ nature of the homemade specialties. Theyâre right. I love the magnificent Corned Beef with Swiss on rye, the Clam Chowder.. and one of the best Prime Rib Sandwiches in town. I donât know if food is a religious experience, but itâs close. If youâve never tried Samâs, todayâs a very good day. Go to SacPerks and get a $25 worth of wonderfulness for $12.50⦠Consider yourself a regular⦠at Samâs Kosher-Style Restaurant and Deli.
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Until last week, the details of this story (originally reported by Gary Woelfel ofjournaltimes.com) were not widely known. Seven years ago, former Los Angeles Clippers coach Kim Hughes was diagnosed with prostate cancer. A biopsy showed  his cancer was much worse than he believed, and after finding out the Clippers organization (the evil Donald Sterling) would not cover the cost of surgery, some of his players stepped up. Corey Maggette, Marko Jaric, Chris Kamen and Elton Brand quietly and without fanfare⦠chipped in to pay for the expensive surgery that would save the life of their friend and coach. As for Donald Sterling, his pathetic record speaks for itself.
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Hereâs some stuff to ponder while youâre checking your bracket.  TheSmokingjacket.com reports that the official name of March Madness is the NCAA Menâs Division I Basketball Championship, but no one says that.Â
.. There used to be a lot fewer teams. As late as 1950, there were only eight teams in the tournament.Â
.. A 16 seed has never won its opening round game.
.. The FBI estimates that $2.5 billion is illegally wagered each year on March Madness. Right. Any time youâre talking about illegal action, just triple that number.
.. The odds of getting 100 percent of your bracket right is one in 147.57 quintillion. You have a better chance of hiring Gilbert Gottfried⦠twice.
.. And finally, NEVER beg someone who knows nothing about basketball⦠to throw in 10 bucks and hand in their bracket. He/She will win it all.
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In ancient times, changing clocks used to take a moment. At least thatâs what I remember.  Now, resetting the microwave is like rebooting a computer. Yikes. The iPhone clockis no bargain. And the car radio clock? Forget it. Oh, and the time on myG-Shockwatch went back to regular time two mornings in a row. I was too embarrassed to tell anyone. Letâs see.. it must have something to do with the DST setting. Gotta be either âYes,â âNoâ or âAuto.â Iâm getting closer.
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I donât know what life would have been like without this movie. Of course, itâs one of the great classics of all time.. but itâs more than that to me and a lot of my friends. A cultural influence? Of course. Itâs enhanced my appreciation of the beautiful Italian language, red wine and oh⦠the food. I canât make a meat sauce without thinking about that scene with Clemenza⦠this is how you throw in your meatballs and sausage. But the dialogue in the first two Godfathers lives forever, at least among the guys. Most women I know are not into this, for some reason. Not just âIâll make him an offer he canât refuse.â Too predictable. I like âbut you needed a drink first.. now youâve had your drink.â Or "I can handle things, I'm smart, not like everybody says. Not dumb, I'm smart, and I want respect!"  Or  âI despise your masquerade; the dishonest way you pose yourself, yourself and your whole f##ing family."   You get the picture.
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I donât suppose youâd be shocked by anything these days. A story on Huffington Postbegins this way.. âOnce again, 50 Centâs tweets are a natural disaster. As Japan works around the clock to dig out and salvage lives and cities from the wreckage of the devastating 9.0 earthquake and subsequent tsunami, the rapper took to Twitter to laugh about the situation.â He wrote..âLook this is very serious people I had to evacuate all my hoeâs from LA, Hawaii and Japan. I had to do it. Lol.â Yeah, thatâs pretty funny. Meanwhile, thousands of bodies are washing up along the coastline and millions of people are facing a fourth night without food, water or heating in near freezing temperatures along the northeast coast. Up to 10,000 are feared dead,and many more are at risk as fears of a nuclear meltdown grip the country. The pictures of the suffering and devastation are heartbreaking, and of course thereâs round-the-clock coverage on CNN. And then thereâs MSNBC. Why they continue to offer âprison programmingâ and Charlie Sheen specials on the weekend, instead of covering one of the worst disasters in historyâ¦. is beyond me.Â
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On Monday night, the Waldorf-Astoria Hotel in New York will be buzzing. Rockâs elite will honor its own, and welcome the latest class of inductees into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. That list will not include legendary music impresario Don Kirshner,who passed away in January. But you could argue that he was a major player in the history of rock and roll.. as a music publisher, record executive and mentor. Heâs the one who discovered up-and-coming songwriters such as Carole King, Neil Sedaka, Barry Mann and Cynthia Weil, and helped launch the careers of Bobby Darin, Neil Diamond, Tony Orlando and Kansas. Letterman bandleader Paul Shaffersaid, âHe brought live music to network television with his Don Kirshnerâs Rock Concert and even gave some early exposure to my boss David Letterman. He was first with the idea of a rock-and-roll awards show (Don Kirshnerâs Rock Awards.) His contributions are lasting⦠Don loved the impression that I did of him (a spot-on satire on SNL) because he knew it came out of the love and respect I had for him.â Without Don Kirshner, we wouldnât have enjoyed âYouâve Lost That Lovinâ Feelin,â âThe Locomotion,â âOn Broadway,â âWill You Love Me Tomorrowâ â¦and the list goes on. And we definitely would not have known some of the best singer/songwriters of our era.
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The Kings were tough last night against the Magic. They played their hearts out and came up a little short. Itâs the story of the season. Well, not the big story, which is that theyâre probably on their way out. I canât help but watch these games with sadness, with regret⦠that smart people couldnât find a way to keep our team here. I agree with Marcos Breton, that this should have all been worked out before the eleventh hour. Yeah, itâs complicated, but I know how Kansas City fans must have felt when their Kings left town. But at least they still have the Royals and the Chiefs.  And now Kansas City does have a new basketball arena⦠and they still canât get an NBA team. At the moment, Hartford, Connecticut is the largest media market without a major sports franchise. So I guess weâll take overthat distinction. Dubious. With all due respect, weâre about to become Modesto. Oh, and I hear that LA fans are dying to have the Kings. Right. That interest level is on fire⦠right after the Lakers, Dodgers, Angels, Clippers, Trojans, Bruins, Ducks, Pluto, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Knottâs Berry Farm and Charlie Sheen. Then the Kings. Yeah, youâll be big news in LA. Hilarious. Up here in Palookaville?  Weâll live. But it wonât be the same.
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Mark Teixeiraâs got one of the sweetest contracts in baseball. He earned it. Heâll be a Yankee âtil heâs 37, and his familyâs set for life. Last week Mark dumped his agent of 10 years, Scott Boros. Fair enough. Itâs a business decision. I know you loved Scott when he got you that 180 million, but I guess you donât need him now. When the story broke, it sure brought out all the Scott Boros haters. Heâs scum.. heâs a slime ball. Yeah, Scottieâs responsible for ruining the draft, for escalating salaries⦠heâs blamed for everything from global warming to the Lindbergh kidnapping. Scottâs pretty good at getting rich owners to cough up a lot of money for his players. Uh, thatâs his job. If I were 18 and could throw 100 mph on the black, Iâd be in his office today. I love Scott Boros. Heâs smart, heâs shrewd, and heâs not Drew Rosenhaus. From what I can see, Scott plays by the rules. You donât like the rules..  change the rules. And Scottieâs from Elk Grove High School. Weâre from the Herd.
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So the Miami Heat have lost their last four.   Theyâre pressing, theyâre rattled⦠theyâre giving away opportunities. Yeah, life is tough in the NBA. And immediately in the spotlight was head coach Erik Spoelstra, who admitted that some of his players were bawling in the locker room  after their latest late-game choke job. Thereâs nothing wrong with getting emotionalâ¦. with wanting to win. Guys cry all the time⦠thatâs no big deal. What surprised me  was when coach Spoelstra seemed utterly shocked that the media would make âcryingâ the headline. Are you nuts? I knew that would be the lead story as soon as I heard the clip. If you donât want to be the star of âThe Crying Game,â then shut the hell up. Columnist Jason Whitlock has a great story here.Â
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Itâs a story of shock, outrage and trauma. TheHerald Sunreports that on board a Virgin Airlines flight, a flight attendant, during a peek-a-boo game, put a toddler in an overhead compartment and closed the hatch. Was that a dumb idea? Probably. But the mother hit the roof, the flight attendantâs been fired⦠and mom says she and her now estranged husband were in shock. Oh, and she says, since her son was in the compartment for up to 10 seconds in complete darkness⦠heâs âseen various specialists since the incident after suffering from anxiety and withdrawal.â  Really? With all due respect mom, seems like the only one who needs a specialist is you. What are you, a drama queen? Your husband is estranged? I wonder why. And this just in⦠most kids endure worse moments and turn out just fine. I mean if 10 seconds in the dark is kickinâ your ass, Iâve got some bad news for youâ¦
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The New York Daily News had the story of Sarah White,who could very well be the worldâs first ânaked therapist.â The 24-year-old psychology buff conducts Web cam therapy sessions in her birthday suit.   Yikes. Before removing her clothing, she asks if her patient objects. Surprisingly, sheâs never been denied the opportunity to take off her top. Then off comes the skirt. Later, sheâll slip out of her undies⦠all the while, listening to her clientâs issues. Sarah says, âFor men in particular, seeing a naked woman can really help them focus, look deeply into themselves, and speak their minds openly.â Sarah, I think theyâre looking deeply all right⦠but I donât know if itâs at themselves. Her website is SarahWhiteLive.com.
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Iâm kind of a fan of Andrew Zimmern, the star of Bizarre Foods. Yeah, the guy is famous for eating some pretty outrageous, may I say disgusting, fare.  In just about every culture, people eat stuff that might be considered awfully strange on the other side of the world. It just depends on what youâre used to. When I see Andrew fondle something peculiar â¦Â bugs, live organs, testicles, rotten meat, I know things are getting interesting. If he says.. âOooh, tastes like bacon..â or âThat is simply devine..â.. Iâm okay with it. I feel like Iâve learned something. What gives me the creeps is when he takes a morsel that looks really horrifying⦠and canât even swallow. Donât show me. I donât want to see it! If itâs as bad as it looks, just tell us. Iâm thinking your show will do fine if you donât eat a spoiled carcass thatâs been in the sun for a year. I get it. Letâs just move on⦠and please pass the larva.
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For some, The Royal Wedding is huge. But the bigger story is that there are entrepreneurs making a fortune on Royal Wedding souvenirs⦠itâs an entire new industry.  We canât even breathe the words Super Bowl or NASCAR.   We canât print photos, cartoons, or illustrations of anything that matters.  We canât use name or likeness of anyone who ever existed after the Han Dynasty without being sued. So Iâve got to hand it to you Brits. You have managed to put the Royal Faces on everything from tea cups to handi-wipes⦠from toilet paper to G-Strings. I donât know how you did it⦠but youâve made royalty worship a profitable art form. Impressive? Quite. I bow to youâ¦.
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Saw this story on AOL Newsâ¦Â An airline passenger in India delayed a flight from New Delhi to Mumbai⦠when he pitched a fit after finding out the pilot was a woman. At one point the guy was screaming, âI donât want to die! She canât take care of the house, how can she take care of a plane?â Security escorted the man from the plane and it took off without further incident. Apparently his tantrum went on for about 40 minutes before his removal. Iâm thinking⦠they must be awfully patient there. Iâd have given this guy the hook in about 30 seconds. Either thatâ¦or let him jump out at 30,000 feetâ¦
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I guess I just canât figure out the deal with Charlie Sheen.  The other day, he got on a private jet with an entourage of porn stars. Isnât he supposed to be in rehab? With all due respect, Iâm sure there are a lot of people in treatment who are saying to themselves..âHey, I want THAT kind of rehab!â Then there are these recent rants about his show, its creators, his bosses. This kind of stuff used to be called the destruction of a career. Now, I donât know. The more he talks, the more exposure he gets. Do we simply have an insatiable appetite to put people like this on the Today Show? Is Charlie Sheen a meltdown in progress, or is he just a cunning, marketing genius? According to TMZ, heâs writing a tell-all book about life on the set of Two and a Half Men, and he wants at least $10 million to spill the beans. Someone will give it to him. In any case, heâs certainly not dull. To paraphrase Bill Maherâ¦âA train wreck stopped to watch himâ¦â
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When times are tough, look for a great review. Thatâs right, when reading about the economy, the budget crisis and the nutbag in Libya gets too debilitating,  I take great pleasure in  poring over a marvelous food review. I loved Blair Anthony Robertsonâs take on Chandoâs,a little taco stand thatâs doing all the right things. After that Bee review, I had a feeling that the line would be down the block⦠and thatâs what happened. Finding these hidden food gems is what itâs all about⦠and word gets out in an instant. Great reviews go viral, and so do the really bad ones. Whatâs that word people like to use⦠âschadenfreude?â Yeah, pleasure derived from the misfortunes of others. Horrible reviews are so⦠entertaining, because we can all relate. And the terrific reviews give us faith, the chance to order up some new found joy⦠and support a business that deserves it. Iâd better get in line.
Itâs an insult, a slap-in-the face, itâs heartbreaking⦠itâs long overdue. However way you want to describe your feelings, you get the sense that our NBA franchise is leaving town. Of course the Maloofs are frustratedâ¦so are the fans.  Who wouldnât be?   And although talk of relocation has come up before, this time it feels more sinister. In the midst of all this negativity, the Kings shocked the Orlando Magiclast night with a gutsy, spectacular performance. I thought of all of the unforgettable moments weâve been witness toâ¦Â with Vlade, Peja, C-Webb and Spud Webb. The last-second wins, holding on against the Lakers⦠the decibel level so high you couldnât hear yourself think. Yeah, weâre small market but weâre proud. At least we were. Iâll keep a good thoughtâ¦. For The Good Times.
I donât blame Senator Harry Reid for suggesting that perhaps itâs time to re-examine the legal prostitution industryin his state. Thatâs what lawmakers do. Harry doesnât want Nevada to be known as the state with the hookers. I get it. He said âparents donât want their children to look out of a school bus and see a brothelâ¦â Not that I would know, but most legal brothels in Nevada are out in the sticks⦠the buses going there donât have school kids. Either youâre okay with prostitution in Nevada or you hate it.   But the worldâs oldest profession is old for a reason, and itâs not going away any time soon. Matter of fact, prostitution is rampant in Las Vegas,and itâs not even legal there. Tourism is Nevadaâs biggest industry⦠and Iâm just guessing that adult entertainment is a huge part of that. So you donât want Nevada to be known for hookers?  Well, thereâs always Hi Stakes Poker. I mean theyâre not flyinâ in here to see Donny and Marieâ¦
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